A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi, I need some advice on how to stop feeling angry with my bf and to understand his actions. We've been together 9 months, and a few weeks ago, we found out we had an unplanned pregnancy of 7 weeks. We spent a lot of time trying to decide whether to keep the baby or not, and it was a really upsetting time for me. He said he wants children with me, and would support me whatever I decided. He seemed less bothered by it, not very emotional, and despite what was happening, he still wanted to have sex with me, and was using internet porn. I wanted to have sex with him too, as it kinda helped me feel closer to him, and everything else in our relationship continued to be great. We spoke about our thoughts and feelings about the pregnancy, but only if I initiated this, and he told me he deals with things by being unemotional, which I didn't understand but accepted.So, last week, I had a miscarriage. I told him, and he seemed a little shocked. What really angers me is that he is still using internet porn. I'm not against porn, but I can't understand why he'd be doing that at such an emotional time. I'm really angry that I'm grieving whilst he's getting his rocks off to internet porn and don't know how to stop feeling this way.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (6 July 2011): Hi please give this message to your bf
How to get rid of addictive stuff
Requirement:
1) Realizing that watching porn is bad for spiritual growth.
2) Realizing that it is addictive and never satisfactory (the more you watch the more you want).
3) The desire to get rid of watching porn and other addictive habits.
Steps:
1. Praying -
In your everyday prayers ask God to take away the desire to watch porn and other bad thoughts. Don’t forget to pray daily! You cannot overcome this habit on your own. Praying is very important!!
2. Shifting Desktop -
Shift your desktop into your living room. Make sure that your family members are able to see what you are viewing on your PC. Having the desk top inside your room gives you the temptation to watch bad stuff. Therefore shifting your desktop to a common place visible to others will control you from watching bad stuff
3. Parental control for laptop/ Desktop -
Make sure your antivirus program has parental control option. Ask your friend to type a password for parental control and start using the teenager mode (NOT parent mode). Even if you’re tempted to go to bad sites you need the password. Tell your true friend not to tell the password. He should type it for you on your laptop. If desktop ask you parents or sibling to do the job. YOU SHOULD NOT KNOW THE PASSWORD.
The later 2 are controls to avoid watching porn but to get the desire to watch these out of your mind YOU NEED TO PRAY! KEEP ASKING GOD TO MAKE YOUR THOUGHTS/ACTIVITIES CLEAN! Ask God that your thoughts and desires should be ACCEPTABLE IN HIS SIGHT!
KEEP PRAYING AND GOD WILL FREE YOU FROM ALL YOUR ADDICTIONS!!
God Bless!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2011): Some people are just inconsiderate and no matter what you do they won't see the errors of their ways but you do need to sit down and talk to him :)
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (5 July 2011):
 I am so sorry for your loss.
everyone grieves differently. you are much more hormonal than usual right now... that is going to affect how you grieve...
you need to talk to your bf and let him know how upset you are and why... but you also need to make sure he gets that it's partially due to the hormonal influx you are going though.
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