A
male
age
41-50,
*airda08
writes:I'm 28 years old and I'm falling in love with my 16 years old first cousin. Ever since she was a little girl I used to watch over her and baby sit for her. I treated her as my younger sister and she loves me as her older brother. we're so close to each other I tell her a lot of stories and give her advice and help her with her school art projects. She's always been my favorite cousin.4 years ago, I moved out to a different town so we didn't see each other for a long time, but she never fails to send me text messages and emails, she's such a sweet girl and so I came back to my hometown 7 months ago because I got a nice job and everything, but the nice thing is I get close to my family again (our family is so close to each other it is very common to our culture as Filipinos and for us family comes first and it's very important for me). So then again my cousin and I are seeing each other again hanging out with the rest of our cousins and siblings, spending a good time together every sunday after church. but things getting weirdly changing over this year as she grows old she's becoming more and more beautiful and sweet and as for me, I started falling in love with her, I might be wrong but I know and I beleive that I am in love because I always think about her, I care so much about her and I wanted to be with her. I know it sounds crazy not only because she's my 1st cousin but also because there's 12 years age gap. I need an advice, I've been through a lot of research about this forbidden love between cousins and I know that there's nothing wrong about it, it is just a modern day taboo but I need an advice on how I am gonna get through this situation? She probably likes me but I know she's still young to understand and take a risk, I care so much about her and her future. I am thinking of telling her about my feelings for her pn the right time or when she turns 18 so she could at least understand. I know our family is against this. I feel so hopeless and helpless I am planning to move away so I wouldn't see her any more and divert my feelings for any other woman, but it's hard. I love her so much that I just cant give up on her. I've been through a lot of reltionships but I never felt this way before, maybe it's because she's my cousin and we're so close. I don't wanna run away like a little boy, I wanted to face it and be a man, but I think sometimes running away is the right thing to do. I am dying to tell her about my feelings but I just can't (it'll make me look so immature). I guess I'll have to wait but I'm kinda getting paranoid and it kills me to think that some day she could find some takers, or lovers other than me if I don't take an action early. Please, I need some good advice and not your opinion and judgments towards cousin relationships, be open minded about it. If you're gonna be rude please don't bother to answer. Thank you.
View related questions:
cousin, immature, moved out, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous1776  +, writes (10 November 2008):
So so wrong!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2008): Run and run as fast as you can. There are too many things working against you for this to ever be right.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2008): You two are related, so it is wrong. Sorry but it's true. The fact you grown up together, makes it even worse. The fact she's only 16 and your 28, well...you should be looking out for her
...............................
A
female
reader, Lovestrikes19 +, writes (9 November 2008):
 I think its pretty normal the way your feeling. Maybe its just another crush- My advice is just wait and see how your feeling is and if it goes away in another week or so- then you realize it could of been love like a brother would love for a sister, same a cousin would love cousin. See in another new week and if your still feeling the same way about your cousin- then tell her don't keep it in any longer- I'm sure she will understand how you feel. Its to better to let your feelings out the open and not knowing if she does feel the same way about you. So my advice just talk to her- You will feel alot better if you do. Guaranteed. **
...............................
A
female
reader, CherryCupcake  +, writes (9 November 2008):
Very brave of you to admit to this problem i think. First of all as you mentioned, it is a modern day taboo and maybe youre cousin is not too keen on the idea in general and will be extremely confused at the idea of you feeling this way towards her. If you do decide to tell her, bearing in mind what you have to lose, then try to explain why you feel this way, like you did in this letter. To make the surprise less odd, if it is. I think you should wait till she is 18 before you mention it and follow advice you recieve. Good luck.
...............................
|
