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female
,
anonymous
writes: Hey me and my boy friend had a lovely time for almost two an a half years, but when the qestion came of marriage, he explained his familial reasons which were stopping him of doing that. He confessed that he loved me very much, but he is helpless...he even said that I should get married with anyone who is worthwhile, but that was the most difficult part. We broke up after that, and had no contact for almost a year. Just in between I got engaged to a cousin, but still my ex's love was on mind. My fiance' is not bad but needs time in building his career...so its almost three years in my marriage. I am still confused about the engagement I did, but now I am stuck.The most difficult part of the whole thing came to me, when my ex contacted me again after six months of engagement and told me about how much he still love me....and can't even think of someone else. Now he wants to be back as his problems have been settled down to an extent. Please help me decide if I should break the engagement? Is it worthwhile going back to him? (I still love n miss my ex but isn't that unfair with my fiance'...I'm so confused.)
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2005): Frankly, I think you are nuts for giving up your fiancee, a guy who loves you and wants to totally offer you something so precious as a lifelong committment. But-in allfairness to him-if you don't love him...let him go. I suggest if you do get back with your bf-never be afraid to ask for what you want re: a committment. Accept nothing less. If he cannot or won't provide it, tell him "adios". End the relationship, if he doesn’t give you the future commitment you want and need. Don’t compromise on the basics. If you want a forever commitmentfromt this guy you love, be strong and don’t settle for lame excuses. Expect the best for yourself.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (31 October 2005): Break the engagement! What I do not understand about you, dear-is why didn't you make sure you were "completely" over your ex bf before getting engaged to this another man. Let your fiancee go. Tell him and be honest, that you don't love him. It will hurt his feelings now, but it will free him to find someone who can treat him right and give him the love he so deserves. He really sounds much more committed, more worthy and more dependable than your ex bf. But let this be a lesson that you always, work out past baggage before involving nice, undeserving, innocent people, in your life. I really feel bad for your fiance-he really doesn't deserve this. Take care and good luck
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