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female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Two of my friends have had a severe fallout.A guy and a girl.They are not romantically attached to each other.Neither am I.We are all a gang of bozos who hang out together.Both of them have been telling me stuff and I don't know what to do.I am so confused.I do not want to take sides.she is closer to me than him.but he is a good friend too.yuck! this really sucks.someone help me out pls.... Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2010): Thank you roadie,PuzzleSolver and strontiumdog.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 March 2010): If you feel that strongly about both of them as friends, then you'll have to stop each one of them as soon as words roll out of their mouths about each other, and let them go at it on their own. If you get involved, one or the other will surely feel you had something to do with their fate that follows the arguing. Never get in between two of your own friends..not even a word, just like you should never talk behind either of their backs when they're getting along..it's the same thing. They will both resent you if you do, and you'll just have to play it smart, as much of a friend as you'd like to be. If you want, you can try to assign a person your age or older, who will have no bias to any of you, as a mediator to sit down with both of them and try to talk sense into them. All you can really tell them, without getting involved, is to calm down and start trying to show each other a little love and respect. That's all you directly can do, without ruining your own friendship with them.
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A
female
reader, roadie42  +, writes (27 March 2010):
 If they keep putting you in the middle, you should tell each of them that you don't wish to be involved. Make sure they know that you're still there for support and a good friend when they need one, but let them know that you feel uncomfortable when they each tell you things about the other and that they need to work this out on their own.If they stop putting you in the middle but are still battling it out, hang in there...just keep treating both of them like good friends, even if the two of them don't get along. I know it hurts when your good friends are fighting, but it's between them - the best you can do is make sure you don't lose either one of them.
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