A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,Having a dilemma, i have been married for sometime now, but feeling like i've lost all love that i had b4, feeling like this for quite sometime now. Recently i met an ex(from a long time ago) and having spent some time txting and talking i really feel like i've come alive again. I haven't taken this any further, because i know it's wrong to do so, but at what point do u put ur own happiness first?? I can't talk to my husband about how i'm feeling because he will just fly off the handle and be very upset. Also we have a child to consider. We married young, and i believe now we were too young, i feel i want to live my life more, i'm only going to be here once. Any advice? xx Reply to this Question
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female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (14 June 2007):
 You will have to talk to your husband. Every marriage goes through highs and lows but communication is vital. Timing is essential, pick a time when you both are rested and calmly discuss your relationship. You may benefit from marriage counseling as well. You need to look at every avenue to save your marriage for your child's sake. Once you both have tried everything and it hasn't made a difference then you can separate knowing you have done your best. It is possible to get the spark back so good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (14 June 2007): I sympathise with you so much as I have been down the road that you are about to go on and I just want to tell you that as unhappy as you feel now I think it is likely that you will find at the end of sometime going down the wrong road that you feel more unhappy. It is too easy to take what you have for granted - to over look all the positives and look for more exciting times in your life - it will be exciting for a while - you will feel elated and alive and on cloud 9 again but then after some time the reality will settle in and you'll see the faults in the new guy - you may find that all you had before was more safe sure known and trusted - maybe you can riak that for the short term excitement you need but my advise is to try as hard as you can to put back what you miss in your marriage - look at all the good points - re do all the things you used to enjoy so much - work on your marriage till you have given it every chance without involving any other person - maybe go to counselling then if it is not working after you have given 100% you will have a clear mind and conscience to take an alternative path - if you do anything else I am sure you will get in a mess and be much more un happy... onre relationship at a time...
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