A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:how do i 'come out to my best mate'?im not gay, i might be bi, at the moment though im just abit curious and would really like to have sex with a man. My best friend seems to be the type of guy thats the same as me, i've not asked, he sometimes jokes saying there a part of him that would do anything, howeever i think he's telling the truth and is also curious?The thing is, i would love so much to experiment with him, but how do i tell him that, if he's 100% straight and doesnt want to do that, then i'll be embarassed, and never be able to speak to him in the same way, we're so close, also, i'm worried he'll
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2009): I would try to bring it up to him. Ask if he has ever thought about having sex with a guy? and If his answer is no than you say, cus you said you would sleep with anything. And even if his answer is no he could still be gay or bi and not confortable in telling anyone. Does he ever check you out, like looking at you sexually? You could always say, would you rather sleep with______ or_____?Think of a hot guy like orlando and a old lady, or you can think of two hot guys and see if he answers. You could just be a lil onist and say I think Im bi but Im not sure yet, and see how he reacts happy,sad,puzzeled. You could ask if he is bi too after.If he says yes then you can ask if he wants to experiment with you. If its no, than its no. I think He wants to hear it from you first.
A
male
reader, gayguy16 +, writes (10 August 2009):
 Yes, Take It VERY slow!
I once had a similar situation, although I'm Gay, He wasn't my best friends, I tryed it on with a male friends because i reid him wrong, perhaps this isnt very scientific but I'm GAY I was wrong thinking this guy I kinda liked was Bi but turned out to be straight after all, Its really a "Win" Or "Loss" situation in my Opinion! but I'm afraid I dont have anymore info.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2009): Take it slow. You need to have a pretty strong hunch that another guy is gay or bi before it's wise to go for it. It does sound like you're halfway there, though, from the little info you've given.
'He sometimes jokes saying there a part of him that would do anything' - that might not be joking, he could be really trying to give you a hint. If the subject of gay people comes up, see how he reacts and what he says. Maybe make a cryptic remark here or there, like if you see a gorgeous man, say something like 'he's really fit', which can be taken both ways, you might have meant it in the innocent sense.
Find ways to be on your own together. Don't come on too strong, but don't shy away from subtly giving off signals that you like him. Make plenty of eye contact and find subtle ways of physically touching. Maybe ask him if he'd like to go swimming, if he is a bit gay you'll likely be able to tell! Or ask him round for a movie and sit near him.
Nothing physical can ever happen until one or other of you is brave enough to make a move. So if you really want this guy, put the effort in to make it as easy as possible for him to guess what you really want. And then, if it looks like you were both right about each other...go for it, grab your chance!
Best of luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 August 2009): you could always not say a word and drop a few suggestive hints to get his attention.
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