A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Ok my feelings are hurt and I want to know if I could have done anything differently.My friend of 5 years who I talk to off and on is pregnant, newly married and just finally got her own place. I had been asking for a few months when we could hang out and catch up, and every time she had some reason not to. I was fine with that and after asking again on the 16th I decided to not ask until she asked me. Two days ago she posted a bulletin on myspace about how someone had called her in the middle of the night and that they needed to grow up. I wrote her and asked her what had happened and she explained what had, and said that some guy had called her and was mean, and there was a girl laughing in the back ground and she heard a dog yapping. She said that the name that the guy gave was the same name as my boyfriend's. My boyfriend has a very common name. I told her that I didn’t do it neither did my boyfriend, and one way to prove that is I just got my puppy a week ago, and the only thing that she knows how to do is whine and chew through her box. I have only heard her bark once when she saw a big dog at the park. My puppy just hasn’t mastered barking. She continued to say that I was her top suspicion. Also if I was going to prank call her I would have used fake names. I said that if she could think that I did that she wasn’t a good friend and it was her loss. She then got mad that I called her a bad friend, and I explained that a good friend would know me better, and know that I wouldn’t have done that, and a good friend would have confronted me personally instead of posting a bulletin.I guess my question here is: Should I really feel bad for what happened? I know that it wasn’t me or my fiancé that called her!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, JustChillin +, writes (26 October 2008):
 Well, it does sound like you are the more mature one in the friendship. That's too bad that your friend got herself into a situation where she got pregnant after only dating the guy for a couple of months. Wish the best for them, as they're going to have challenges of their own in really getting to know each other...all while being expectant parents. =/
You've already told her you weren't the one that had called in the middle of the night. She needs to think enough of the friendship to take your word at face value!!
But, it does appear that you're mature enough to realize the difference between true friends and friends that end up not being so true!
Congratulations to you for getting your education done before you take that walk down the aisle. But, best wishes in the regard, as well. =))
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI think that it is best that i just forget about it i stressed about it all night and barely slept and thats just not healthy. I think that if the friendship could be ended by her over somehting i didn't do then she wasn't a good friend. If she figures out who really did it an apologizes then we will talk.
Also Justchillin we are in two different areas of our life i have been with my fiance for four years and Im going to college and have been living on my own for more than a year and my friend got pregnant by a guy she was only dating a couple months and then got married because she was pregnant and just finally her and her husband moved out of her moms house a week ago and she is about 5 months pregnant. I think that I am at a more mature stage in life.
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A
female
reader, shelby429 +, writes (25 October 2008):
Dear A female, You shouldn't feel bad It's her falt she should apoliges not you but if you feel bad about it you should try to forget about it and continue with your friendship. And I don't want to lead you down the wrong path but I'd just not talk about and try to becoe friends again.
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A
female
reader, JustChillin +, writes (25 October 2008):
Unfortunately, you two are at different places in your lives now. You are single, she is now married and on top of that she is an expectant mother. I'm sure her priorities have changed. Try to be more understanding.
By all means, don't give up the friendship, but just be patient. Just know that your day will come too, that you will get married and expecting your first child. Just understand that your friendship has not gone away, but the dynamics of the friendship have evolved.
Best wishes to you... =))
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2008): No try to forget about it if you didn't do it you didn't do it, if your friend fails to accept that it wasn't you, then there is little you can do about it. You probably feel bad because she is pregnant and she is probably under stress with pregnancy newlywed and new home probably isn't sleeping as well.
Leave it a week or so give her a call and see if things have settled down between you.
If they have fine if not don't protest your innocence just ask her what reason would you have for doing that and tell her she's your friend and leave it at that
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