A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:ok this may sound a little bit weird,I am 20 years old and have jus got my first girlfriend. This girl was quite a good friend of mine before we got together, n then she told me she liked me I felt the same and we got together. Before we got together I was prayin that we got together cuz she is a decent girl n i really liked her, ive always thort that about her as decent incomparison to some girls,I have always known her to b honest with me. Basically we're both virgins, and before we got together I asked her about her past as in how many guys shes bin with she sed shes bin in two relationships one for two wks n one for two months both guys cheated on her. I told her I have been with a couple of other girls cuz its embarassing not to have bin with ne1 by 20, i tink the onli reason i havnt been with ne1 is cuz i had lack of confidence n was to fussy when it came to girls, i have liked other girls before, and then after being with her for one month she told me she also had a fling all she did was kissing n she also tld me she kissed a couple of random guys before that she told me this voluntarily without me asking. Her past bfs bothered and so did this fling n other guys shes kissed i didnt expect it to effect me bt it did i keep getting visions of her wiv with those other guys!!!! for some reason it makes me wonder if shes kissed ne1 else or dun neting else in the past bt the fact she told me about the fling voluntarily is that a sign of honesty? n y does her past bother me is it cuz i love her? or is it cuz i feel inadequate? other girls past never bothered cuz i dnt really care lol, one part of me wishes i was more experience another part of me doesnt wnt to be wiv ne1 else but her,I have onli kissed one other girl properly before her,it feels like i wish i was more exprience then her! is that my male ego? ok i know she hasnt done much she is stil a virgin! incomparison to some other girls by 20, bt it feels like she has done more incomparison to me if that makes ne sense? i am the first guy she let finger her n the first guy shes got most physical with, i feel close to her physically n mentally! she feels the same, she say she hasnt felt like this for ne1 before and has given me her heart! she also told me about her cuzin tryin to rape at the age of 14! she has onli told a couple of close friends about this. Ok i feel bad that i keep tinking about her past so recently she went away abroad which meant i cudnt speak to her for 10days, i thort this would be the opportunity for me to test myself to get over those thorts of her past bt the thorts havnt stop! I did miss not being able to speak to her. Y of all the people does this thinking of the past happen to me!!help me!! Ive bin lookin 4ward to getting my first girlfriend n first relationship! N now i wish i ws more exprienced now that im with her! someone help me get rid of this visions!! i have days wen i feel like i dont wnt ne other girl cuz they are not as good as mine, bt other days i wish i was more experienced help me please someone thankyou sorry about making u read all that bt will really appreciate anyones help to help me get me through this!i dnt wnt to hurt her i do miss her tho!
View related questions:
both virgins, confidence, her past, kissing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (5 April 2007):
 You have been obsessing about this girls past forever now. For at least as long as you've been with her! I assure you, you are going to ruin this relationship if you continue to think this way. There is NOTHING more I can say, other than you just need to accept that she's with you, she loves you, period.
If you feel so inexperienced, and you think you're going to continue to obsess about this - BREAK UP WITH HER. You're going to make her miserable. Go out there, hook up with some chicks and then go back with her. I would never advise this, however you are a special situation.
If you have a good girl on your arm, don't screw things up. She's not thinking about her past, I swear. Everytime she's with you she's not sitting around thinking about all the other guys she's kissed.
This jealousy you have of her is getting out of hand, and yes - it's jealousy. You want to either have hooked up with as many girls as she had boys or you want her to have never hooked up with them at all. Well, that option just isn't going to happen. We all know you can't take back the past... she's probably forgotten about hers - why can't you?
No one can help you get rid of the visions. That's only you. If I could go into your head and take them out, I would, but I can't. Sorry. That is up to YOU. Everytime you start thinking about her kissing, just think about her kissing YOU.
Lucky you're not dating an actress. You'd go nuts with her stage kissing!
|
