A
male
age
41-50,
*jbehave
writes:I have been married to my wife for 11 years now and she has been the only woman I have ever had sex with. For about 9 of those years she has had a lot of issues physcially and mentally that has caused her to totally lose her sex drive. For the most part, I have never begged her for sex or even pushed the issue of having it more because I know she is going though a lot, so I just take care of myself like most men do. Well, recently her best friend has moved in with us and I have been flirting a lot with her and she in return. I have found myself very very attracted her, and feel that I may possible cheat on my wife with her. I love my wife very much but am extremely curious of what it will be like to sleep with another women. What should I do?
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best friend, flirt, moved in, sex drive Reply to this Question
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male
reader, tjbehave +, writes (20 August 2009):
tjbehave is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the feedback. It has helped me alot in this decision with my wife.
A
female
reader, Tigerlily +, writes (16 August 2009):
Oh dude... please. Surf around here and read all the agony posts of women who's husbands are cheating... of mistresses who are heartbroken that they are involved with married men... even of married men who are in hell. Seriously - read those so you can get a true understanding of the fallout that would accompany you indulging your "curiosity".
Then, the other part that I'm struggling with is your sex life was fine for 2 years...but now the past 9 years of your 11 yr marriage you've been denied sex because your wife has "been going thru a lot"? Seriously? She's had enough time to sort herself out. You need to sit your wife down, say look honey, I've supported you working thru things for 11 years... but I am a man and I NEED a sex life, so now it's your turn to support my needs. Let's figure out what we need to do here before I lose control. Tell your wife that you have never cheated on her, but you don't get any sex and you've started thinking about it.
You sound like you've been a total saint, but your wife asking you to live your life as a sexless monk is not cool.
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A
female
reader, L*  +, writes (16 August 2009):
divorce your wife and get another woman. but don't cheat on her!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (16 August 2009): It's just the matter of time. There was a time where for sex or "sharing love", you just would look upto your wife as you loved her a lottt. But as for the time, you no more fing pleasure with your wife in terms of sharing love, you are attracted towards another women. As she has been able to attract and fantisize you more than your wife. This is quite normal. But the worst part is that her friend and you are actually ditching you wife and her trust. I do agree that you no more find sex pleasure in your wife but that does not mean that you have to turn to another women to get that pleasure of complete your feelings. This is only for short-time pleasure. What would hapen in long term. Such relation sdon't work for long-term. I do appreciate that you have been honest to ask others advice and I am sure that you are a good human beeing and a husband as you care for your wife and concern about her. But if you really do, then don't give yourself time to think about this bull-shit stuff with your wife's best friend. You would be actually thinking that it is not wrong to have it once. But if you think to get away from your wife once, then after her best friend leaves, you would like to have it the 2nd time. And then whom would you find then. First of all, move your wife's friend out of your house. Then take your wife out for some vacation and talk to her. She will understand you. I am sure. Try to make her happy by doing sweet stuff. Its upto you how to keep your life alive with romance.ALL THE BEST
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