A
female
age
30-35,
*opelessromanticXO
writes:So, I'm bisexual and have a huge crush on a mutual friend who is a female. I've seen her around before because we do have friends in common but I've never actually spoken to her before. Basically, she doesn't know I exist which at this point is a very good thing because I'm biding my time trying to figure out how to approach her. The thing is, I'm not positive but I'm fairly certain she's straight or at least only been in relationships with men before. What makes me think that she could possibly be open to women is that she leads a pretty alternative lifestyle, she's a punk rocker and artist (I know that doesn't mean anything) and she's a total free spirit with tons of gay friends (again, I know). I'm very confident in myself but I'm not sure how to approach her. I'm going to a party soon and I know she will be there, so should I send out the flirty vibes the way you would with a crush, or should I first try to win her over as a friend and then see what happens? I want to try to flirt with her and then see how she responds (if she's not into it at the very least I hope she would just be flattered) but at the same time I wouldn't want to potentially ruin a friendship. So, should I risk it or not?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2012): Try to find out without asking her, through mutual friends or looking her up online. It's less risky and if you find out she only likes guys, no need to waste your time. If this doesn't work then go ahead and approach her.
A
female
reader, AuntyAlexxmo  +, writes (31 May 2012):
 Is there no mutual friends you could ask privately about her sexuality, just to give you an idea what you are working with?
Either way i would just talk to her at the party, be a bit flirty but not full on and see how she responds, if she flirts back maybe flirt some more if she doesn't then tone it down and get to know her on a friendly level.
Something i do ( you might not like this its up to you) is talk about famouse people such as musicans or actresses i find attractive and ask the person if they fancy thm, its a good way of seeing how they react and getting some idea of whuch gender they like.
good luck!
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