A
female
age
36-40,
*ello,you
writes:A man has asked me to date several times .I don't know should I accept ? It is said that girls have been raped by the man while they are have a date.For this man,I am just first time to meet him in the college.I am a open-minded girl ,easy-going and friendly girl . I make friends with each other very easily.But I don't know if it is dangerouse for me to date with that man . Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Yes, I'd stay away from him. There are a lot of nice guys out there who aren't risky-- I'm sure that you could find someone else to date. I have a bad memory of a guy who was a counselor at a prestigious summer music camp, who had a thing about Asian girls. He spoke Japanese and a little Chinese, and he would go up and talk to all the fresh new girls who had come from Asia. They thought he was just a friendly guy who could help guide them to life in the States, and were a little flattered by his attention... until he raped them! I heard about him because a friend of mine who's Asian-American (he was smart enough to leave the native English speakers alone) was approached by a 16 year old Japanese girl he had raped. She was scared and needed help going to the hospital. In the end she refused to press charges because she was afraid somehow that her father in Japan would lose his job because of the shame of a trial, and of course the camp hushed it up because they didn't want bad publicity. I'm sure that guy and others like him are still walking free, preying on naive young girls.Still makes me mad to think about it, even though this is years ago.
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (10 July 2008):
 I would be careful, if you heard this from different people then it is very likely true.
One person telling you might just be someone with a grudge but if it is different people who have no reason to work together...
You wouldn't be the first woman to ignore warnings until it is to late.
So consider yourself warned.
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A
female
reader, hello,you +, writes (10 July 2008):
hello,you is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thank you very much.
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A
female
reader, pepper27  +, writes (10 July 2008):
 Hi Hunny
You say that you have been told that girls have been raped by this man while on dates. This is word of mouth from people around you people that no him more. Now Im not one to judge at all but depending on certain information why would people say such a thing if its one person even why? I no for a fact that if anyone said this to me Id be very carefull sweetheart, well more than carefull its hard sometimes to listen to what others say and take it in as truth or foolish gossip but If its more than one person and this is a known thing were you are I would think twise before going anywere alone with anyone that this was said about and thats just being safe, I no people can gossip and say the wrong thing about another but you have to make sure you are safe hun TAKE CARE WITH LOVE MANDY XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 July 2008): Miss, you are right to be cautious. You are in a strange country and many of our ways will be difficult for you to understand. The best thing to do is, if you feel uncomfortable about a person, do not date them - same as you would be back home. However, not all men are rapists - some of us are good guys too you know!
Just wait until you know everyone a bit better and if there is one guy who interests you, ask the other girls their opinion. Maybe at first, you could go on a foursome, just to be safe. Go with a girl friend and return with her and you should be ok until you get to know the guy better.
Take care and good luck - saijian!
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