A
female
age
30-35,
*sarabethx
writes:So I'm a virgin and I've been wanting to wait till marriage for that special night but recently my boyfriend of about 2 years has been wanting to have sex with me. He says he really loves me and I really love him as well. The other night while hanging out in private, we started making out and he touched me there. I had these weird feelings. We ended up being shirtless when I stopped myself. Its not akward between us after that but I really want to know, should i maybe go for it or wait? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Miss.casalola  +, writes (20 April 2010):
I was kinda in the same situation. I knew he was 'the one', and so I did it.
I can only say now that I wish i'd waited.
It's not that I don't enjoy it now, I do. But I just feel that once you sleep with someone, you make a very strong physical and emotional bond with them. And should you not stay together, you leave a little piece of yourself behind.
Ask yourself what the reason is you want to wait. Is it moral, religous, etc. Or is it just in ideal that you think you should follow? Because if it's something you believe in, you might feel guilty in the end, and could resent that person for what you did.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010): i'm 22yrs old and i am a virgin! i'm with my boyfriend for 2years now but i know him for about 16years as a friend.
i wanna wait for that special night too,but my boyfriend always wanted to have sex before marriage. And he did! he started dating other girls and was cheating on me, i recently found out when he got locked up in prison.
i was thinking of loosing my virginty with him butsumtin was stopping me, i just listened to my heart..i'm soo glad that i never..
just think about it before you make a decision..you don't know what you got until it's gone!
best ov luck chick
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 April 2010): Staying a virgin until marraige is very difficult and it takes a lot of self discipline. It doesn't happen because single people just never feel the urge to have sex before the ring is on the finger. They want it all the time, they just succedd in controlling themselves.
If you sleep with this guy now, then you have to be willing to break up with him later without any marriage and still be okay with that. Right now you are not engaged and you cannot assume you will be marrying this guy no matter what you both say to each other and feel like. Saying "We should be together forever!" in the heat of the moment is one thing, but having the real ceremony and filing the legal papers is something else.
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A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity  +, writes (17 April 2010):
 I was in a similar situation where I wanted to wait at least until I was engaged to have sex with someone. I wasn't really religious, but I thought sex was a really powerful statement, so I wanted to wait. I met this guy and we ended up being together for almost two years, and I ended up having sex with him because I thought that we were truly meant for each other. I really thought he'd be the first and last person I would be with.
Anyway...things started to fall apart fairly quickly. We had different schedules and he had different priorities, and I was no longer happy. I tried to work things out, but he wasn't really willing to change anything. So we ended up breaking up. The point is, you may feel like you're going to be with someone, but things don't always work out. I will never regret what I did, I truly loved him at the time. But I still think that maybe if I just waited, I would still be a virgin and I would have been able to save it for that person I'm supposed to be with. So if you really want to wait, stick to your guns. You won't regret anything and you won't have to wonder anything. Relationships can really take a turn for the worst unexpectedly, so just think about it for a while before you make a big decision. Best of luck to you. :)
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A
male
reader, alfTHEmouth +, writes (17 April 2010):
I guess you have to ask yourself, what's the point in waiting till marriage? If you end up marrying the guy, why not enjoy it now? After kids and a few years down the road, it won't be as exciting. If you end up breaking up with him, at least you've gained some experience that might help you in future relationship(s). For that reason, I'm not sure what the benefit is in waiting, unless it's part of some deep, perhaps religious, conviction.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (17 April 2010):
 I honor your saving yourself til marriage. I also greatly honor following your heart. Maybe your desire to have this with him, is a sign that he is who you've been waiting for. What you don't want is to regret whichever decision you make. Be honest with yourself. If you desire it this much with him, have it, and he's not the "forever", that you can live knowing this was still the right decision for you. Take care.
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