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I'm a guy, Why can't I feel anything during sex?

Tagged as: Dating, Health, Sex<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (5 July 2008) 5 Answers - (Newest, 6 July 2008)
A male United States age 36-40, *hadowrathe001 writes:

I"m a guy who is 20 years old and been having sex with my gf for about a few months. The only problem is I can never really feel anything during sex, which bums her out because I don't really moan or squirm as she says.

She does love sex and doesn't really complain about the job I am doing but its always "why can't I feel anything?". She doesn't know and I just tell her that I am shy and I will get there but this is really bugging me. I can't even stay hard some times and I can look at her and not get hard.

God I love her.. so I need help this is my future wife..

I need her so please help thank you.

View related questions: shy

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (6 July 2008):

lexilou agony auntThe reason I ask is that I know a guy who doesnt orgasm as he has no nerve endings in his penis, dont know the ins and outs of it but basically he gets no pleasure, even when masturbating though so it doesnt sound like thats the problem here.

Maybe your girl's getting too wet?! Im not sure about the desensitasation thing, my hubbie has been masturbating since what 13? or so?? He's now 37, still masturbates regularly and we also have a lot of sex and he has no probs!

Have you had this prob with other girls? x

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A male reader, shadowrathe001 United States +, writes (6 July 2008):

shadowrathe001 is verified as being by the original poster of the question

I masterbate and yes i can feel it lol i've read i've masterbated to hard or something and it desentizied or something x.x ughh... but and for that other guy i can't feel any pleasure, though sometimes i do kinda feel something every now and then its very light but there . this jus happened a while ago so maybe its all working out, i'm till worried though cause its not awesome like every one out there is ranting about. And ya i plan on opening my own cafe' with her, she is my back bone.

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A female reader, lexilou United Kingdom +, writes (5 July 2008):

lexilou agony auntCan you feel anything when you masturbate or is it just when you have penetrative sex?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008):

Hey q1605, here's the cool thing about being a woman...we 'get' why it's so much better to have an emotional connection to sex and we don't need useless, empty, unattached sex LOL.

shadowrathe001, I would be concerned that you can't feel anything, this isn't normal. Perhaps somehow you have inadvertantly desensitized your penis, try not masterbating for a couple of weeks and see if it becomes more sensitive. If not, see a doctor, asap

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A reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008):

See a therapist or counselor and a doctor. Sometimes its a mental thing, and sometimes it's physical. Other times its a thing where the emotional attraction is there but the physical attraction isn't. That's usually is the case. Just keep in mind that you love the woman so don't worry about your feelings. I know.. I'm a female but my mom is a nurse and my teacher was a previous therapist. I know what I'm talking about! well.. try what I said and see how things work out. I cant help anymore than that.

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