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female
age
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anonymous
writes:I am 46 years old and in the process of having my marriage annulled. I met my high school boyfriend after our 25th reunion. His marriage is he claims on the rocks. We have been inseparable since 3 months ago. I had asked him where our relationship is leading to as I do not want to involved in just a fling. I truly love him but I am afraid that the man that I love now is not the same guy I loved 25 years ago. He is asking for time to prepare to leave his wife and family and start a new life with me. Is he really going to leave his wife? Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2007): I have to agree with the first male poster, I think this is a big red flag that he is trying to start up with you while he is married....of course he is unhappy in his marriage and thinking of leaving his entire family for you, what more could he say if he is getting into your pants, which it sounds like to me he already has if you have been inseperable for the last three months....
I would tell him no way am I going to hang around and be responsible for destroying your family....it would be highly unlikely that he is going to leave his wife and kids for you, when he takes a financial hit, and gets the blinders of lust of his eyes, he will start back pedaling just as hard and as fast as he came on to you.
Cut bait and run.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2007): I have been through the exact same thing this past year or so, having met my first love again after 30 years. He left his wife by coming to the UK to be with me but wanted to be delicate towards his family's feelings so did not come totally clean for a while.
I know it is hard and sometimes scary, you will get cross, frustrated and everything else during the process but please try to keep supporting him. Don't grab on, be brave and let it happen as it happens. Nothing in life is guaranteed but this is worth a very good try. I hope that you get through this and are as happy as me, a year on.
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female
reader, deejuliet  +, writes (13 June 2007):
 He ISNT the same man he was 25 years ago, and you are not the same women! You have both grown and changed and have many life experiences that have shaped who you now are. He may or may not be actually leaving his wife. It is hard to say from this. If he truly was in an unhappy marriage and was leaving her anyway and meeting you was cooincidence then it may be true. If meeting you was the catalyst for his saying he was going to leave her, then I doubt it will happen. I hope the former is true. You want him to be leaving her for the right reasons. He needs to get a divorce because his MARRIAGE is bad, not because he has met a new and more exciting honey. He shouldnt be leaving her for YOU, he should be leaving her for HIMSELF. Do you understand the differance?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 June 2007): First of all, no, he isn’t the same man, no one would be. You might end up liking the man he has become, but with all these emotions and hormones racing about, you can’t see him clearly yet. It’s harder to do, but I would say back off and ask him to call you when he has actually left her. Talking about it and actually doing it are two very different things. With your emotions so heavily involved it will be impossible to tell if he is just stringing you along. It’s fatally easily to believe what you want to when you care for someone. Tell him again that you love him, but be clear that you are not going to be “the other woman”. Stick to it.
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female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (13 June 2007):
 Give him time and see. Some people do leave their husbands/wives for other people where as others string the other lady along. Just be careful of your emotions.
If you start to feel that he's maybe taking you for a ride then cut ties and tell him to come find you when he has actually left her.
Good luck
xxxxxxx
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A
male
reader, VyRuZ  +, writes (13 June 2007):
Well, i don't really think he would do that. You see, it's much more difficult for a man to do all that because most have insecurities and an inability to get women.
He's just saying all that to get in your pants. I'd say, screen him out BIG TIME before you do anything drastic ;)
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