A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm really depressed, I can't deny what I feel. I'm 19 and never had a girlfriend. I've never even kissed a girl. It is something about myself I despise. I'm constantly surrounded by couples and I'm friends with so many couples I can't stand it anymore. It seems that everyone my age isn't a virgin and has had a significant other before, except me. I feel like I'm going to do something unhealthy as a result of this. I always think of why no girl likes me, and I over-analyze myself trying to figure out what is wrong with me. I hate feeling like an outcast among people I'm surrounded by. It's become an obsession. What should I do about this?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 November 2011): I am 22 and still a virgin. I have had a few opportunities to lose it but I haven't. However my friends don't know I am. We played a drinking game and you have to say what you have done. I said I had had sex just to almost live up to what they had done. I am not ashamed myself, I just hate the way it is almost shameful to tell other people and my friends said they were proud of me for losing it (plus they expected I was a virgin so never asked me any of the questions which was worse)! I wish there wasn't so much stigma surrounding it.
A
female
reader, yanna58  +, writes (29 November 2011):
It's hard not to be upset when you feel left out, but 19 is still VERY young. You still have plenty of time to get a girlfriend and have sex. Try not to take it all so seriously. Plus, lots of people exaggerate their sexual conquests. I don't know from your question whether or not you have a social phobia or are excessively shy. If this is the case, maybe you should talk to someone about it. Are you afraid of being inexperienced? If so, I wouldn't worry about it. Most men your age are very inexperienced despite their claims of sexual prowess. Relax and approach a girl. Don't go for the most beautiful ones, try to talk to a sweet, dorky girl. Maybe she's looking for a boyfriend, too. (And no, I'm not saying an ugly girl, I'm just saying a shy virginal one). You are fine. If you were in your 40s or even your 30s, I'd say you might have deeper issues, but being a 19 year old virgin is hardly as unusual as you think it is. Somewhere out there a girl is waiting to meet you and be your girlfriend.Relax!
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A
female
reader, monacons  +, writes (29 November 2011):
Ok where do i start, there is plenty of people out there your age that are single and still have not had a partner, your still very young i now you may feel left out when all your other friends have girlfriends but behind it all i bet there wishing they were single so they can go out with friends and just enjoy them selfs.. Yes dont get me wrong having a partner can be good sometimes then other times can be hard work!! You need to bust you confidence and rest assure there is noting wrong with you, you have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with anybody else.. And there is plenty of girls out there your age that have still not had sex it just you dont hear them talking about it.. After all it is private right.. Hope this helps you and remember keep your head up good things come to those who wait :)
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