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female
,
anonymous
writes: IM 14 YEARS OLD AND WANT TO RUN AWAY. WHAT SHOULD I DO? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 March 2006): Running away doesn't get rid of your problems, it just adds to them, trust me. It may not seem like it now, but girls who live on the streets are constantly running way from their problems, and not dealing with them. Running away adds problems onto the ones you already have, so that won't really help, will it?You may be surprised to find that you are not the only person who feels this way. In fact, there are many girls who feel the same way as you do. Some are not as strong as you are, and are unable to hold themselves back from doing as their concsious tells them to. In your question, you don't say why you feel this way, so you need to talk to someone about it, writing into this page is the first step to sorting this problem out, and in a few years time, you'll be thanking the world for DEAR CUPID website!So, however hard it may be, talk to your mum or another trusted relative, who can help you sort out the problem. If you can't talk to family members, then talk to your form tutor, school nurse or a nice teacher who can help.Please don't run away, if you do, you'll feel like running away again, but this time you won't have anything to run away from. It's a cruel world out there, and people passing beggars on the streets rarely help them. You don't want to be one of those people that get spat upon by members of the public. There are people out there who WANT TO HELP, and there are people out there that WILL HELP. Try doing things that make you more interested at home, like listening to music, reading a book, watching television, playing the computer, or anything that stops you wanting to run away until your problem is sorted.Why not try and ring CHILDLINE on 0800 11 11, a friendly helpline, where you can talk to trained counsellors. It may be embaressing and you may think people might laugh, but the advice there is completely confidential, (that means it doesn't go further than your phone call and it can't be traced back by nosy members of your family).
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2006): helo my name is mia and i am the same age as you. not so long ago i also wanted to run away and i didnt know what to do. first i asked a teacher i trusted and they suggested that i see a councillar. so i did.the problem i have is my family. my counciller has said to me so many times that just because people are hurting you, dont hurt yourself anymore. if you do feel like this again write everything down into a book and if that doesnt help ask a family member. Dont feel like you havent got a choice becoz you have. i still sumtimes feel like running away. hope all goes well. mia
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 February 2006): when i was ages 11 to 15 i ranaway,stole cars,wentto jail,went to bootcamp,and got on probation,did drugs,the whole package if it was hell i went threw it and why because i ran away from home and trust me you dontwant to go threw the same shit because i seen a lot of stuff i should not have seen and suffered alot of pain that i did not have to and it all started with runing away just thik about it because when your sitting in bootcamp for 6 to 12 months babygirl you got nobody to blaim but yourself and whatever it is it caint be that bad cause what dont kill you makes you stronger just dont sweat the small shit,trust me it aint going to do nothing but make you strongerso keep your head up and let people hate cause as long as your name keeps comeing out peoples mouth and they keep husteling you girl you still doing what you need to be doing so LET THEM MOTHER FUCKERS HATE
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A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (27 February 2006):
 I'd suggest that you talk to someone about WHY you want to run away.
No one can really answer your question without more information, so find someone (preferably an adult) that you trust, and tell them the answers to some of these questions: What are you planning on running from? Or whom? Are you planning on running *to* something, like another relative? Or are you wanting to run away *from* something, like bullying at school? Have you told your parents what's going on in your life, and given them a chance to help?
One point you have to be clear on is that "running away" is never a good answer to any problem. It's not rocket science to realise that a 14-year-old isn't employable, not when there are lots of unemployed and probably more experienced adults competing for the same jobs. So, you have to face facts: no one's likely to give you work, so how will you take care of yourself?
Unfortunately, at your age, you can't even legally enter into a contract, so you can't get a flat or borrow money either. You'll always be reliant on someone to give you what you need, and -- make no mistake -- there are lots of awful people in the world who'll take advantage of that situation with threats and violence. It's just not safe.
If you're having normal adolescent troubles, like problems with the opposite sex, or with friends, or with fitting in at school... those are things that school counsellors and your parents can help with. Here in Australia we also have the Kids Help Line, so you have someone to talk to anonymously. I feel sure that other countries will have similar programs for youngsters feeling as you do. Have a look in your phone book under "counselling".
However, if you're in real strife, like you're being physically or sexually abused by someone, or you feel like your life is in danger, what you need to do is not run away, but tell the police. They WILL believe you, and they WILL protect you. They'll also contact the community services to help you find someplace safe to live.
Please don't think that you can run away from whatever the problem is. If it's very bad, you need to tell someone, so the community can protect you. If it's not so bad, but it's still affecting your life, you need to get if off your chest to someone who's trained to understand your needs.
Remember, you're not alone. Everybody on the planet that's more than 14 years old has been where you are and probably a lot of us have similar experiences. We're proof that you can get through whatever it is.
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