A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I am a thirteen year old girl and i like my thirty three-year old teacher. The thing is, he isn't even that attractive. I only like him for his personality. I would NEVER tell him how i feel, because i know he doesn't feel the same, and if he did, that would be illegal. He is married and has been for the past ten years. A couple of weeks ago i told him something personal about one of my friends hurting themselves, and he was really cool about and helped a lot. I know he cares for me, because i swear whenever he is teaching he looks directly at me. He always asks me how i am doing but doesn't seem to ask any of my other classmates. He has bumped up my grade before without my asking, and whenever i ask a question, he always says "that's a great question" and refers to it the rest of the day. I know this is weird, i like other people my age, but he is the only one who seems to care back. I guess that's because he's an adult, and my teacher. Just please help me. Is this even normal?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): it's not only normal , but it's *totally* and *completely* normal, i mean, who doesn't crush on their teachers.
but, but, but...
you're absolutely right, don't tell him, there's nothing good or useful that will come from that - in fact, unless you have a counselor or therapist, it's probably best not to tell anyone, except here.
but i repeat, it's not only normal, it's fine, don't stress about it - you can't control who you are attracted to, but you *can* control what you do about it, and in the end, i think by keeping it to yourself you are doing the mature thing.
good luck and best wishes.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks kelly (: hahahahahahahahaha3
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A
female
reader, KellySaysRawr +, writes (12 December 2010):
In my opinion i think its cool to like your teacher. I liked my teacher last year but this year i have met new teachers and that feeling as gone away. A simple "Hey how are you doing" is always good and shows that i still want my old teacher to remember me. Since he pays alot of attention to you then he probably likes you as a student
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): it's not wrong to like him. When I was 15 I liked my 29-year old math teacher, but he wasn't married or had a girlfriend. We became really good friends and as time passed we both fell in love with each other. He was the one to tell me he had feelings for me first though. He has always been the most wonderful person and up to this day we are still dating and plan to get married :) BTW I'm 20 now
Trust me when you really love someone, age doesn't matter! what matters is whether the other person is in a relationship or not.
But don't you worry, you'll get over him sooner or later if he considering nothing can really happen between you two. Just meet other people and have fun. you are still young, enjoy your life :)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you (: and yes, i wasn't going to plan on telling him . i know he doesn't feel the same, and if he did, he would hopefully not say so
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): btw, yes i am aware your not planning on saying.
hope it's helpful. like i say i really wish someone had told me this a few years ago!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): here is some advice i gave tot a girl planning on telling her teacher
"okay. a year ago i was in this situation.
i will tell you what i know now i'm older.
sorry some of these are harsh.
1) if he has kids they could be about your age which means that he will not see you in a sexual way, he will see you in a paternal manner if you see him and are a nice girl
2) its normal to be attracted to a teacher but it is not normal for him to be attracted you you. i see from your age group that you are under the age of consent. laws founded on moral standards are there to protect the people, you will see this when your older
3) DO NOT tell your teacher, it will be extremely embarrassing especially for him when he has to turn you down and sort out for you to be moved class
4) you may be mature for your age, but that does not make you mature
i am not trying to be harsh or provoke you to do the opposite of what i say out of spite, you have to understand i am really trying to help you here. the reason i'm on this website is because i needed help with this exact problem! i wish someone could have told me this 3 years ago! i never told any of my teacher, but looking back the idea that i nearly did make me want to die of embarrassment, i would not be able to set foot in that school even now.
please listen, you just have to live this out. it's not pleasant but im afraid you have no choice
please keep us updated
xxxxxx"
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (11 December 2010):
 http://www.dearcupid.org/question/crushes-on-teachers.html
You may find some answers in this article.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): you may not be great student but you try your hardest which often means a lot more to teachers tahn the ones who are naturally gifted at subjects
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionbut i'm not that great of a student. as i write this, i'm studying hard for a test in his class on monday. but i do pay attention so i don't know why he would stare at me all the time. i get about a C and B average in his class, nothing special. thanks for you comments (:
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): yeah course its normal :) he obviously cares about you and respects you but not more than student ive got a teacher like this we're a small cflass mainly girls and hes like part of our family and does his best to help us and protect us . its good you're smart enough to realise that he doesnt ahve feelings back and it passess in time just keep concentrating on boys your own age
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): It's natural to have a crush at your age just as long as you realise that's all it is and nothing can ever happen between you and him. It doesn't sound like he likes you anymore then the other students. He probably thinks you are a good student.
Just because he looks directly at you it doesn't mean he likes you. Teachers usually do that to make sure you are paying attention in class. It's just a crush that you will get over.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2010): Teen
Infatuation.
Perfectly normal.
You will get over it soon. I swear. There are teachers who like their brilliant students. That doesn't mean they like them romantically.
Study well! And make the best use of your teacher in getting good scores :)
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A
male
reader, steph007  +, writes (11 December 2010):
There is no problem with your feelings. You may like anybody around you, and even he may like you. The only point is that you should not (must not) make any physical relationship. Likes and dislikes are independent on the age.
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