A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm 13. My uncle got married and his wife's nephew and I are the same age. In the summer last year we saw each other quite a lot. He gave me his hotmail address and we chatted. He admitted he fancied me and I admitted that I fancied him. That didn't really last long. He gave me his friends email address and we started talking. We are now the best of mates... more that mates even. He admittied he fancied me but he said he "wasn't sure". I admitted I fancied him also. We are the best of friends so it hasn't affected us one bit and nothing is awkward. The problem is that I live in the Midlands and he lives in London. It's like 100 miles apart. We have both witnessed online relationships but agreed they were kind of stupid. I've never met him before and he has never met me. There is a good chance I will meet him this Easter. Should I make a move seeing as he clearly likes me or am I moving to fast? The thing is he isn't like normal boys he really understnds me and I would say I was more sexually pumped than him. I might get to see him but probably only once then we will go back to chatting hundreds of miles away... Is it wise to start a relationship with him in one day then just go back to normal chatting? Sorry about my story being really long... my life is way complicated.
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Fot The Advice
A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 May 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for your help guys. I wouldn't have sex with him. By making a move I meant kissing him but nothing even close to sex.Should I make a move, go back home and keep chatting to him online till the next time I see him (which could be months away)?
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A
female
reader, livi +, writes (24 March 2007):
 hey,
I would say dont go see him and have in your mind "yeah im gonna have sex with this guy" go in and be yourself, but it all sounds a bit dodgy, maybe take a friend with you, you hear way too often of girls being abducted, freaky or what! take a mate and go somewhere public, but be yourself and if it feels comfortable tehn do something, but be safe. also it sounds like there is way to much pressur to be closer then mates. what is wrong with being rele good mates? sometime thats better thren dating the person, you get to talk more and he will tell you stuff that he wouldnt if you were his girlfriend.
Good luk with it all my lovely :D
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (24 March 2007): Hun, reading your posting and hearing you state. that at 13 years of age, you are sexually pumped for this guy, deeply troubled me. If that means you are so turned onto him that you are considering having sex with him, all I have to say is..13 years old is entirely too young to be engaging in sex. You can like this boy and spend time with him, and be a friend and get to know him when he visits, but you do not have to have sex with him-even if he is “hot”. There are so many hurtful emotional upheavals that happen to girls when they have sex so young. After doing it, many of them regret it deeply. Why? Because they soon realize that many boys will only like them if they have sex with them. You could painfully find out that this guy, will stop talking to you after you do have sex with him. He knows your Aunt's nephew and news can travel fast. You get you a very bad reputation, where you live. And then...do you only want to be liked by boys because they have heard you will have sex with them? Do you want to be used for sex by a boy? I do not think so. Your body is special and it's something that you should preserve at least until you are older and know more about what sex is. You have many other qualities to offer in a relationship that do not include sex. I am not saying not to have sex ever, just wait until you are older and better able to understand what you are getting yourself into. There are emotional risks of having sex as well as other complicated issues such as the risk of pregnancy, sexually transmitted diseases, and so forth. I would suggest you start educating yourself about sex and the devastating consequences can be for a girl your age, who wants to have sex far too young. Seek the guidance and support of your Mother or a trusted older female friend (Aunt, sister) who can help you with these feelings. You need to find out why having sex at 13 is not a healthy, smart thing to do. If this young man you like comes for a visit, just get to know him as a good friend for now and build this relationship slowly. You will never regret doing that because it will show him that you have respect for yourself and that is what he'll really take note about you. Good luck, dear.
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