A
male
 ,
*ecentguy1
writes:Okay, I need some advice please. I'm a male, 39 who is in a relationship with my girl, who is 26. We have been together 4 years, and while we've had some rough patches, it is still special and we do love each other, and are committed to one another. My question:When we met, it was hot passionate wild sex all the time. And it has always been amazing when we do make love. However, lately, she hasn't been responsive. For example, we don't live together, so she stayed over my place Saturday night, and nothing occured. Sunday morning, nothing. We had a great day, and that night, nothing. She came over tuesday after a party and had a few drinks in her (usually that works!) and again, nothing! I stayed at her place last night, and again, NOTHING! What is going On? I asked her if it bothered her that we are intimate lately, and she was like, "well, I don't feel like it all the time". If she reached down and tugged on my underwear, I'd be excited, and desire her bad! If I did that to her, she'd say in a whiny voice, "baaabe, c'mon" . I know she isn't cheating, she has no time. But what the hell is up? Obviously I still want her like it was the beginning, and I know time slows all passion, but to avoid sex, what is she saying? Do I not attract her? Help Me understand please, and what she is thinking...if she loves me, she should desire me as a man right? thank you all!
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female
reader, Jendorset  +, writes (1 February 2007):
If she hasnt got time to cheat on you then shes obviously a busy person. Which means she might not be in the mood because she tired. And yeah, guys like to be grabbed in all places.But when your are girl being touched up all the time makes you feel like the guy has no respect for you. Have you had a proper talk with her about it. I mean, it seems like you havnt had sex for a litte while and your having a tantrum about it. She isnt there just to please you ya know. Perhaps if you made her feel special, took her somewhere nice or bought her a present as she may be feeling down but your to busy thinking about your trouser department to NOTICE.
A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (1 February 2007):
 You have been together for 4 years so you should be able to sit down and talk about this. Tell her your fears, ask her why she's been so unresponsive. If she says she doesn't always feel like it then tell her of late she NEVER seems to feel like it and that's just not her. Ask her if there's anything worrying her? Is there someone else? Has she gone off you? There's obviously some explanation for it, SOMETHING'S GOING ON... it's just whether she's going to level with you about WHAT? She needs to talk to you and be honest and I'd do it sooner rather than later.
Have you ever asked her over and she's not been able to manage? Have you called her lately and she's been out or not answered her phone?
Eve
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