A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:im 22 years old and my ex boyfriend is 33 years old we were together 4yrs before he broke up with me past november because he needed time for himself. we stayed in touch afterwards and on christmas eve i found out he stayed over his ex girls house. we broke it off but after all that i kept trying to fix things anyways because he said he loves me he was just confused and may i add, on christmas eve he went by my house to drop me off a ring. it wasnt the first time i caught him with the same gir,l but i thought she really didnt mean anything to him since he said they were together 1yr. anyways ive been trying to fix things as if it never happened since then and i feel like he loves me, but only wants friendship and i dont want that. for the whole 4yrs i accused him of cheating and he manages to turn all of this on me but recognizes he messed up. we have been fighting every day even today because i want to know if she's in his life still. he tells me to leave him alone that right now he's confused and is concentrating on work not on me. i guess i feel like i cant leave him alone because it's been so long and i cant believe he would put me through this and because i feel worried that if i do he's just going to be with someone else. he says he doesnt want me completely out of his life and i keep hoping one day he'll want to be with me again so what should i do?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2009): Don't have any contact with him. This way he will miss you being around and it will drive him insane not knowing what you are doing. (try acting uninterested) Even if he calls don't talk to him. NO CONTACT! remember... this way you will know if he truly loves you. as it stands right now he's not been away from you enough to truly know what he wants. give him his space. and I would advise you to do the same. go out with friends or be with family. your loved ones are the only people who can get you through difficult times in your life. If he loves you he will come back, He has got to know what he's got and he will only know that if you disappear. Good Luck and keep me informed.
A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (2 January 2009):
 Reading between the lines he sounds like he is telling you some lies. Firstly he wants you to leave him alone, sounds like its so he can re kindle his feelings for his ex, meantime, stringing you along in the background in case nothing comes of it. Your gut instinct over the passed four years about you thinking he is cheating on you could be spot on. Do you really want to waste your time with this man who seems to be toying with your emotions. Don't hang around too long for him or he may break your heart over and over again. hope this helps.
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