A
male
age
30-35,
*eehound
writes:I posted on here a while ago saying how I was really struggling to forget my ex of around a year ago, and how I was really out of ideas on how to get over it because it was driving me crazy. Since then something has sparked in my mind and the pain is not as bad as it was. I don't know what happened, I just don't find myself thinking about her as much anymore. Of course I still love her and think of her probably more than I should, but I've begun to accept that it's over. ANYWAY, since then I've began to start to see other people which has started to refresh my mind. I have a girl friend of around two years who I am really close with. Long story short, she used to like me and I used to like her but neither of us really knew the other liked each other and even if we did the circumstances weren't right for us to go out. Over the 9 months or so she had a relationship with one of my mates. In the past month he has been over in Bali and i've been hanging out with her. Nothing has happened between us nor did I expect it to, but I have been getting more and more attracted to her.A few days ago her and my mate broke up as soon as he got back from his trip and it's safe to say he is devastated. He loved her so much, but I think this is what turned her off him. She says she lost feelings for him because he was way to clingy and she missed doing the things she never got to do when she was with him like seeing her friends often etc. I'd like to point out that me and this guy are only casual mates. Yeah we went to the same school and we talk a bit and when we hang out together with other people it's all good and we share a laugh.. but he isn't that sort of mate that I'd call at 3am in the morning if I needed help, not that close at all.If i have feelings for this girl, what do you suggest that I do? Do you even think I should go after her if i'm keen and think that maybe she likes me back a bit? How long should I wait? This is the first girl I have ever had feelings for since my ex girlfriend of 3 years and I broke up last year, and I don't want to mess things up due to these tricky circumstances. Thanks heaps for your help.
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male
reader, Beehound +, writes (10 February 2011):
Beehound is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThey have been broken up for only 3 or 4 days. I have been friends with this girl for around 2 years now, even before her and my friend even met and we consider each other really close friends. I've been trying to make her feel a bit better about the break up because she feels terrible that she broke the guys heart.
A
female
reader, ashley187  +, writes (10 February 2011):
 First of all.. how long have they been broken up? If this is fresh.. my guess is this girl wouldn't be ready for a relationship right now anyways. Why don't you just try being friends with her? Thats the best way to start out a relationship anyhow. And when your mate hears that you are friends; you will be able to see his reaction towards it. If he is completely upset about you being friends, then he would really dislike you if you started dating her. How much does your friendship mean to you?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2011): dont put yourself in a very tricky situation. I bet that girl..does not have feelings for you..because if he does like you..she's the one who will..contact you anytime.. all i can say is friends last longer than commitments..
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A
female
reader, charlie.butcher  +, writes (10 February 2011):
 Make the move, definitely!It will show that you're keen... if you don't you may regret it!If she sees that your eager, she may be more inclined to want you.. go for it!!!
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