A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I just want to know if I am over reacting or if my husband has not been respectful.My husband never touches my breasts and every time I ask why he just says that is him and he is not attracted to women’s breasts. I have been suffering about his thought and the way he acts when I ask him to touch my breast for the past 6 years.The other day I was referring to a friend when we were out to dinner with bunch of our friends and when they could not remember her, I said the girl that my husband was talking to all night at our last party! Then everybody looked at my husband and he said well the only reason was that she has big boobs!!! I was really hurt. I am a 34 DD and I get comments on my breasts all the time and then my husband ignores them and give me the speech that he is just not a boob man and then comments about another woman's breasts and the reason he was talking to her all night!I brought it up two days after and he thinks I am over reacting and being childish. Is he right?
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female
reader, charliesdevil73  +, writes (3 October 2011):
 First of all, a man can be a butt man and still look at nice boobs. And, a man can be a boob man and still look at nice butts, and so on. So, yes, you were overreacting a little. But, as a woman I can understand why. You were hurt that he would notice someone's boobs, but never want to play with yours. It's understandable that you were upset, but you shouldn't be. He's a man. Men love the way women look, and even if boobs aren't his cup of tea, he will notice them. It doesn't mean he wants to touch them or play with them, but he can't help but look. Even I notice a nice pair of boobs. It's hard not to look, especially if they are on display. I would just tell him you are sorry you got so mad but explain why you did so he can try to see it from your point of view. Maybe then he will not be so blunt about things like this in the future.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2011): Boob talk is one of the most common converstations for men, regardless of whether they are into it or not. It's comparable to women talking about clothes and shoes. If you two were in a group with friends and your husband was caught on the spot (as he was), everybody turned their head to him, he probably just said that instinctually, give a response he thinks everybody wants to hear, as a joke, to sound cool and to exert his manhood. Men do this all the time, especially around friends. It means nothing. It's almost like a formality. So definitely would not worry about that comment at all. Your issue is about your own body and how he ignores your parts. That is something you both need to work on because it is making you insecure. So much so that it is affecting your sense of humor, understandably. I don't know what to tell you to make him more responsive to your desires but maybe talk to him gently and seriously.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (27 September 2011):
 PS....when I hear that stuff about men saying they're "breast men" or "leg men", I keep thinking of a guy eating a plate of chicken. Where are all the good "gizzard men"? heh.
I can't help it. :|
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (27 September 2011):
No, he's not right. He's a complete idiot.
I'm guessing that he was being sarcastic or trying to be humorous or fit in with this conversation, but to remark on a woman's breasts like that in front of his wife is absolutely disrespectful and callous. To compound it by calling you childish and saying that you're overreacting is even more callous and hurtful.
What an asshole and a half. I'd tell him off and say that he better not ever say that again in your presence, or you'll tell him that you're not a penis woman and leave it at that.
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