A
male
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Hi. I've known this woman at work now for about 2.5 years and we have started dating for the past 12 months. Our relationship has grown out of friendship. Anyway, the other day she told me that she thinks that someone else (who may not know about me and her) has the hots for her and that she has known about this for the last 3 months. No problem there, I thought 'cos it's only natural for attractive women to be pursued by any number of guys. Only trouble is that she reckons this particular guy could actually be in love with her and she says that obviously this makes her feel very uncomfortable around him. He is taller than me and admittedly better looking and - at the moment - in better shape, physically! He's actually a very likeable guy. He has also been on the scene at work for a few years - slightly longer than me. My question is, should I feel threatened by this man? I'm worried that her discomfort around him may change to curiosity and from there to attraction.
View related questions:
at work Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, InterCntlCHmp  +, writes (14 November 2008):
Just play it out. Take buddy out for some drinks or bowling; meet him on a man-to-man level, ask him for some advice about work to stroke his ego a bit; let him know honestly and straight up where you stand with your woman. He'll respect you and see you as a friend and who knows he might be a good guy to know.
Tell your woman that you've talked to him and he's chill; she shouldn't worry so much and then reinforce your commitment to her. Let it play out; don't ruin your career over some HR drama.
Try to make it a policy not to fish off the company pier that way you'll find your relationships only tend to stress one dynamic of your life.
Good luck
A
female
reader, leni  +, writes (14 November 2008):
hi, the first thing i think is why didnt she tell you this 3 months ago? and, how does she know that he is in love with her? did he tell her? if someone else told her,then it must be known in the place where you work and so why haven't you heard about it?
...............................
|
