A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:What does it mean when a guy does this in association with others.With his friends around, he's nice and shy. His friends notice you but don't laugh or smile or anything. You find out that they later tease him about a girl from that nationality and link stories that relate to you two. They give you and him space to talk and don't go away but definitely make room for you.HOWEVER, with his friends that are girls, or a specific girl that does seem to like him (and I believe he may too). She says shit like "poor you she's always around you." And instead of just getting quiet, he defends he says, "I know. I can't get rid of her. She really does follow me everywhere." This happened after he had started to get distant from his usual crowd, and her. Because of how he was about it with that one girl, I got out of touch. I was really hurt. I know she was trying to get rid of me but I feel like he really put his pride before me and that he wanted to show his single status to this other girl. Am I right?
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male
reader, Odds +, writes (24 September 2011):
 I could be wrong, but I think you're seeing this the wrong way. His remark to the girl sounds like the kind of flippant, sarcastic dismissal that works really well for getting someone to be quiet - that is, he really was defending you from her. Personally, whenever chicks get catty like that, I've always found that actually trying to confront them for their behavior only makes it worse; it's better to joke about it and move on.
As for his guy friends, you've heard that they tease him about you, but do you know all the details? It's possible he was defending you, and you just never heard about that. More likely, it was just typical guy banter - act dismissive towards everything to show your independence, to show you're not tied down. Every man knows it's just banter, that it doesn't mean anything, but you go through it as part of the male bonding experience, like locker room jokes.
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