A
female
age
51-59,
*nnsumm
writes:Ive been split from my ex hubby for over a year now. I have dated a few guys but nothing special has happened, although I have been messed around a bit and have at times felt used :-(Anyhow, i have just started seeing this new guy. We are both in out thirties, and i really like him, he is interesting and good looking with it. He appears to like me and has asked me what I want from a relationship. I told him that whilst I don't want a casual sexual relationship, I also don't want to get too serious. He said he pretty much wants the same and isn't just in it for the sex (of course he wouldnt admit it, even if he was). We have been on three dates and the last time we went out things got a bit 'hot n steamy' which was nice. Does anyone have any suggestions as to how long I should ideally wait until having sex??? I feel like I want to and think he does too but I suppose I am scared that he will up and leave afterwards! Do I wait or go for it?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (4 December 2008):
 It has to feel right for you, I dont think anyone on here can give you the right answer!
Personally I would wait until you have been dating for around a month just so you know more about him and that would give you a better idea of what he wants from a relationship.
But if it feels right sooner then go for it as long as you dont feel to emotionally involved! Men are a mystery some times, especially when it comes to sex. Many a time I have thought a guy was really interested in me, saying all the right things but then after we slept together I would never hear from them again. You will never fully know how he feels, some men are honest and wont mess you around but some will tell you everything you want to hear just to get you into bed!
Only you will know when it feels right, just try and wait as long as you can! Good things come to those who wait!
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