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I'd move in his city in order for him to preserve his job but he is not ready for marriage yet, should I stay or go?

Tagged as: Long distance<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (31 March 2008) 1 Answers - (Newest, 31 March 2008)
A female South Africa age 41-50, anonymous writes:

I am been in a 7 year relationship,separated by distance for 3years up to now,

Our careers are both doing very well in each city, He has recently been interviewed for a position in my city but this job is a junior role compared to the position that he has also been interviewed for in his current city.

I told him that I would be willing to move to his city provided we were married but he has just told me he is not willing to get married yet,

Should I stay or go?

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A female reader, birdynumnums Canada +, writes (31 March 2008):

birdynumnums agony auntIf it were me, I would go.

If you had already given yourself a time limit to get this relationship moving towards a future together (as I suspect the 3 year separation has been), he really hasn't made any serious moves towards getting your lives back into the same city, or asked to take it to the next level. I suspect that if he says he isn't ready for marriage, he won't be in one more year either. It's totally up to you, but how long are you prepared to wait? Right now, you have hitched your wagon to something that is at a dead stop. If your heart is set on him, then the only thing that you could possibly do is move to his city. If you feel that you would be sabotaging and sacrificing your OWN career, is he worth the chance? I would consider the fact that he isn't you only option. You are a young woman. Perhaps it's time to be single again? Best of luck, hope this helped you sort some things out.

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