A
female
age
30-35,
*anette
writes:Coming out as a gay girl on my 21st birthday was the best decision I ever made. I'm now in my mid-twenties and have a loving, trustworthy partner who I've known since my days at sixth form college - though not well enough at the time to have known that she, too, was gay!We've been together three years now, and I know how lucky I am. However, on the morning when we were due to go on holiday together earlier this year, I was taking my time getting out of bed, so she sat on the back of my legs and tickled the soles of my bare feet for a minute or so while I laughed helplessly.She's obviously written this off as a one-off prank - just as I did when I prepared a salad for her and sat giggling as she tried to slice the plastic tomato I'd included with it - but since that morning I've been having secret (but vivid) fantasies about being rendered helpless while she tickles me.How do I approach her about this? If anything, the fact that I've known her for so long makes it more difficult. As far as our love life is concerned she's generally the one who takes the initiative, and I like it that way; so she would think it very unusual for me to harbour such an idea.
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male
reader, no nonsense Aidan +, writes (22 November 2017):
Good lovers like to get positive feedback from their partner. She might be the one to take the initiative but that might just be because you are more shy and, as you say, happy with it being this way.
Why don’t you tell her how much you liked that experience and would love to experience those feelings again? Let her know that it made you feel good and then introduce the fantasy you have. In the grand scheme of things, it’s not all that controversial.
I wish you all the very best.
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