A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: Since my childhood I could always remember not being close with my family, there were no ties. I'm close with my mom, dad, and two brothers but I'm talking about my Three Aunts, two uncles, and my four cousins (this is both my mother and father's side because none of us are close in either family). I don't know what happened and with xmas coming up (1 out of 3 times a year we see each other yearly) it makes me want to say something to everyone together rather than gossip about it and blame one person. I did ask my mothers sister why no one talks and she blamed her mother (my grandma) for being so negative, I said that wasn't right cause no one else made an effort so it's everyone's fault not just grandma's we're all grownup's now what happened in the past should be let go. I should add I was never close with my aunt's children either they were always kept from us for example: I went with my aunt for the first time to watch my cousin's 5 year old's xmas concert (whom I've seen about 5 times since he was born, they never even let me hold him as a baby, I've never babysat) and I was sitting in my cousin's home felt uncomfortable I tried to start a conversation with my cousin and all he said was "hi ___, I'm good." and ignored me so I talked to my cousins son and played some games. The sad thing is we all live in the same city within a 35 minute drive of one another.My question is: How can I got about confronting everyone and ask why there are no ties and if we can all make an effort? Would this be a good start? Please some ideas how to approach this I'm kind of shy but I want to get to know my family I want children with my fiancé in a few yew yeas and I want them to know their family too. :I would understand if no one want's to make an effort and we could all continue being acquaintance's and gossip about one another rather than being a family. We can go back to our private lives without communication but I don't want that. Speaking for myself I've made some stupid mistakes but so has everyone else and it's all forgiven so we all shouldn't hate each other for them or not talk for whatever reason we choose it's not right. Thanks aunties and sorry for the length.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (13 February 2013): What my family did ( this is just an idea ) was friend everyone on facebook and occasionally message them. As they get more familiar talk to them more and more. Eventually meet up with each of them individually or by family. Make connections that base around you and not each other. Eventually make it all larger until you all are in one place for your great aunts 100th birthday
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