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female
,
anonymous
writes: I like a guy who is married and he flirts with me majorly. does he really like me or is he just flirting just for fun? and he is always giving me those looks like "i want you" and today we saw eachother and he got a huge smile and waved and stared at me through his rearview mirror..i dont know whats going on, but im starting to like him more and more...and more...to be honest i really don't care that he's married....i know thats bad to say, but its true.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 April 2006): I had the same thing with a married guy at work. It went on for a couple of months and eventually something did happen. We has an affair for a couple of months but then his wife found out. He has gone back to her, and basically lied about a lot of stuff that happened, for example one night we went back to their house when she was away. I promised I would never tell and we have stuck to the same story so that his wife would take him back. I have come across as a complete slut and those who know about what happened still blame me, and I have lost friends because of this. Especially as I found out from his wife that they were trying for a baby. Seriously, don't get involved, it will only end up with you getting hurt.
A
male
reader, hp7540 +, writes (16 April 2006):
Most guys are, honestly, truly decent guys. Decent guys don't cheat on their wives. No matter what story he comes up with to justify it/get you into bed, this guy isn't.
If this fellow is someone worth being with, he will work on whatever problem he says is there. First. He'll be honest with his wife. They will either work things out, or he'll take care of the situation and resolve it or move on. First. Before he looks for someone else.
If he doesn't have the character to do that, is he someone you'd really want to be with, anyway? I hope not. Find someone with honesty, integrity and good character.
The jerks get all the press. Some women think all guys are jerks, because they only pick those types of guys to be with. (And all of us do "dumb" things from a woman's point of view, just because we're guys and we're different.) But, I've been around guys all my life. When no one is around and we're being honest - we love our significant others, honor them, care about them, cherish them, work hard to make sure they are happy... and we're faithful. We might make the odd comment about someone looking good - but we go home at the end of the day and take care of the one we love. Find one of the many good ones out there, and don't lower yourself by settling for someone that a) you can't really have; and b) if you get, you won't really want in the end.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2006): I found myself in this same situation a few months ago, something did happen and his wife found out. They have since seperated and we are living togther it is good but be prepared to have major trust issues togther. Because of how we started Iam constantly wondering will he do the same to me, if he did it to his wife whats stopping him from doing it to his girlfriend. But i'm hoping that eventually this will stop. So if you decide to go for it be ready for a very rough ride.
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A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey  +, writes (5 April 2006):
 You may not care that he is married, but you should!
Oneday you will go on to meet the love of your life, and I'm sure you'll want the whole package, marriage, kids, and commitment. Think how you would feel being the wife who's being betrayed, would you like it? If you're honest with yourself, probably not.
He may be a flirt, you may be attracted to him, but he's married!
Find someone who's single, at least you won't have anything to feel guilty about. You know full well he is married and so should you embark on an affair with him, and he gets caught, you will be as much to blame as he is for the hurt that his family goes through as a consequence.
Do you really want all that on your conscience?
I hope for his family's sake you don't fall into this emotional trap!
Good luck.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2006): Firstly, I think you need to concentrate on your own self-respect and on loving yourself, instead of being admired--by anyone (married or not) who simply smiles and flirts with you. You have enormous control over your feelings and you can make decent, good choices. That comes from within you. Love and desire works much like a drug on us. One's brain gets stimulated and they feel happy and alive but many of us use our common sense, too. Think of his wife. Women nowadays, with husbands and families, have enough to contend without other women creating more problems for them. Try to realize that you want self-gratification at any price, and you stand to cause pain to so many people. You are on a slippery slope here and you will get burned. and why do you feel so low about yourself, that you'd only accept a relationship with a man built on lies and deception? You really deserve better, don't you?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 April 2006): Hi. I had that going on for months...does he/ doesn't he like me/want me?. Well, we are both married and now ask me am I happy?? Cos we have started seeing each other secretly. Honestly.. no, cos when I am with him its great, and not always about s#x. But when I am not, or when he says he will ring and doesn't..I can't call him cos I don't know where he is, is he with family etc...that's when I am really unhappy and wish I didn't feel this way..and wish I had never started anything...Remember I am without him MORE times than with him..so more UNHAPPY than happy. Don't do it.
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A
female
reader, shania +, writes (4 April 2006):
 While you dont seem to care that he is married,i think his wife will.Now while im not here to judge you and you obviously find it flattering that this married man has taken an interest in you,the problem with this situation is you are both attracted to each other and i can see eventually that an affair will start....or he might just want a one night stand,surely you are worth much more then that? Another thing is that while you are not bothered that he has a wife,you might start to have strong feelings for this man and then you will be bothered that he is married....do you want to go down that road? You have got to consider these issues,if i was you it would be better to set your sights on a single man.
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