A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:dont know what to dobeen friends with a guy for 3yrs met online and have never met in person - theres a 9yr age gapfor the last yrs its been totally on a just friends basis u kno nothing romantic or sexual but we've obviously cared alot about each other suppose there's been unsaid feelings coz i'v had bfs etc and he works away lots where we cant talkmore recently we've been more open with how we feel, we can hav phone convos that last for hours on endlast night we txt all evening just jokey suggestive stuff, nothing perverted just jokey innocentanyways we ended up talking on the phone till 6 this morning, we just want to curl up with each other - it would be heaven, have never wanted to kiss someone so much and he feels the same - pretty much said i'm the love of his lifebut we ended up having phone sex, it wasn't weird thou, it just felt natural - sex with other people before has never really been about love but this felt really specialbut i'm really shy about meeting up with him, i'm pretty insecure and no matter how much i love him i'm scared he'll hate me :-( i mean its been 3yrs alreadyhelp. because i'd do anything to feel safe in his arms
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Original shiraz! +, writes (9 April 2009):
Dont go to far* Am so sorry in the 3rd paragrgaph down i made a typing error in fact looking over the answer i made a few, sorry for any confusion.
A
female
reader, Original shiraz! +, writes (9 April 2009):
You want his love and youve fell into the situation where you almsot pine for him. After 3 years i think its ok but keep your guard up, dont let anybody you dont know (personally) in too soon, people arent always what you origannly thought.You feel deep for him but you havent met him? This happens a lot and sometimes genuine relatinships come from the beauty of online meetings yet there always the other side where things dont go to plan, im sure your more than aware of this just a reminder, i know how easy it is to fall and the words mean so much but sometimes they arent always followed up with what you want/need or expected and it can come as a huge shock, someobody you feel is part of our life turns out to be the oppisite.Im not trying to turn you against the idea just keep your head in the right place and dont go too fat or it could come crashing down. After 3 years im doubting hes going to hate you! He knows you as a person as long as you have been genuine and honest throughout (which i assume you have as you feel so deeply for him) then the personality side is out of the way, no longer an issue.Its normal to be nervous! Being insecure is part of finding who you are on your own with the influence of others simply guiding you, its your journey at the end of the day others are just along for the ride, some get off half way through, some stay with you to the end, there the ones that count. Anyway back to the matter in hand! The age gap ill be a problem, you already know this so start to prepare, some can make it work some find it the reason for a break up of a relationship, it will always be of an issue yet as you get older not as much.Maybe it felt special because it wasnt physical and not too personal? You know him as hes let you know him but the real him? that might still yet to be seen.Dont run in hoping for the dream, Keep your mind set on everything its always a risk but if you feel one worth taking then give it what you got. You say '... feel safe in his arms' it gives me the impression you are longing for love, im not saying this isnt it but it may still be out there for you so dont just feel that this is it for you, your still young. You will get so many emotions when you do finally meet him, it will take over you but keep your head on like i said you need to keep the guard up and never fall too deep. I wish you all the luck
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