A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I really am not sure if this is the right place for this. So I am sorry if not. I have been having problems lately holding down a job. I am scared that sooner or later things will start to get pretty bad. I have been lucky in missing bullets for a while. I just don't like to live my life by chance.I have a child that is three years old. I had a lot of luck with everything on holding a job, Before the 3rd birthday. Everything went down hill. My partner did not respect my wishes at all. I was out almost all day looking for a job. Come home then clean the house, cook dinner. Of course spend time with my child.He sits on his bum all day. Playing video games. Today is the last day and he knows it. I will have him pack up his bags and leave if he does not get a job. (Going out today) It's my house, My car,etc. I paid everything always UTD. So now it's just stressful. It's to the point where I will sell my body just to make sure there is food on the table for my child. When I spoke this to my "family"-Who no longer care for me due to an abusive man in the family, and I calling him out on it.- They told me they would spit on my grave??!!I'm just so hurt nothing I do is right... Is it bad that I am willing to do this?
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you everyone for your advice.
I ended up getting a job and so did my boyfriend. I told him "just cause you have it does not mean things will change. You need to hold it."
I looked into Food Stamps and signed up (so to say) I know it'll take some time but I am more than willing. I just hate to accept help... Makes me feel worthless. But everyone needs to accept it sooner or later.
Odds- It made me giggle when you said my boyfriend was the father of my child. Funny enough the father of my child is more worthless than this man I am with now. I know it might seem a bit untrue after what I have stated. But I promise you he is worse.
Yet again Thank you for everything :)
A
male
reader, Odds +, writes (27 August 2010):
 It's great that you care so much about your kid, but prostitution would be a dangerous choice that basically makes it impossible to get a father figure in your kid's life in the future. Avoid it. Wait tables isntead.
You're doing everything correctly now, including throwing the guy out. The only mistake you made is, unfortunately, the biggest possible one - you conceived a child with a man unready to be a father. This sort of difficulty is exactly what you can expect as a consequence.
Just focus on solutions for now. Do you have any friends you can rely on to help with the kid, maybe in exchange for future help with their problems? Can you find a better-paying job? Work on those, throw out the guy, and just keep trying at it for your kid.
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A
male
reader, Cerberus_Raphael  +, writes (27 August 2010):
 It isn't bad that you are willing to do this. One of the truly amazing mothers, you have my respect for your devotion.
The boyfriend is useless and you are right to throw him out. Like Dirtball said, please don't sell your body.
Your family was wrong to show such disrespect. You are wrong to think that nothing you do is right. Everything you've been doing so far is the right thing! Yes, Dirtball already mentions organizations and government services that shall assist you in times of need, you'll always have help.
God bless you
I hope that helps.
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A
male
reader, dirtball +, writes (27 August 2010):
 It is admirable that you would do anything for your child. I would however strongly discourage you from selling your body to pay the bills. What will your child do when their mother is locked up for prostitution? What about the dangerous people who may kill you? What about the risks you'd be opening yourself up to with disease? You do no good to your child if you're dead, surely a job serving fast food would be better.
You're right to kick out your deadbeat boyfriend. He's not contributing, and that is not fair. You have a child, you don't need another one that should be an adult.
Your family sounds like they are the opposite of supportive, I'm thinking it would be best to avoid them in the future. You know where they stand. It's unfortunate, but not likely to change in the near future.
I know that there are emergency services available to you if you're worried about a roof over your head or putting food on the table. Even if you lose your job. FEMA and the each state sets aside money to fund the food pantries, homeless shelters, energy services, and other local recipiant organizations that are there to help people in need. I'd suggest looking into the Emergency Food and Shelter Program in your area. Often places like local churches or the United Way can point you in their direction. Good luck. Things will get better. Stay strong.
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