A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hey people just wanted to know wot to do...ive been with my gf for about a year now we do hava good relationship..but theres a few things that bother me and im worried it may effect our relationship..we gave our vrginity to each other.. I keep getting the this gut feeling that shes tries to hide things about her past from me..for example she told me about this fling she had with someone which i didnt like to hear bt she said they didnt much more then just kiss..but for some reason ive tried to ask who it was a couple of times and she always tries to avoid answering the question its like i know the person..i understand shes doing it for my protection bt its annoying at the same time as i feel like im going to lose trust in her..I dnt think she realises that i have noticed her trying to hide it from. do i say something to her about it or just let it go?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2007): I completely disagree with the other 2 answers. You have every right to know about her past, especially if it involves someone you know. That may affect how you interact with that person from this point on. Also, her keeping stuff from you isn't a good sign about the strength of your relationship. If you can't even get her to talk about this, dump her and move on to someone who wants to be completely close to you in a relationship.
Good Luck.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (4 December 2007): Let it go. There is no reason you need to know who it was. This is really bothering you and only bothering her because that it bothers you. Once it stops being a problem to you it will most likely stop being a problem for her. This is a sign that you are holding on to tight and need to stop trying to control every aspect of her life. When/if she wants to tell you this (which it is okay if she doesn't) you will be there to listen. If you press the situation in my experience you will probably lose her as you come off as someone too needy. Trust me, you don't need to know. Live in the now. Be happy.
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A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (1 December 2007):
 I think it's best if you let it go. Be aware of not becoming paranoid. What counts is what she is giving you right now, and she is good to you. Count your blessings.
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