A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I've been seeing this guy for about 8 months now and throughout, he says he wasn't ready for a relationship. I'm kind of tired of waiting so recently we decided to 'take a break' in order for him to figure what he wants. We established that we wont be seeing other people during this break and yeah..should I be the one to wait for him to initiate contact? I feel like I might be waiting forever and i'll crack and be the first one to talk to him..or how long should I wait? And do you think there might be a happy ending in all of this? He's like 25 and has had only one other gf so he clearly doens't rush into these things..but 8 months of seeing him is a long time.
View related questions:
a break Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, BrokenHeart34  +, writes (24 August 2008):
Okay, from the beginning he was telling you in so many words, you are not the one. He said it by saying "he wasn't ready for a relationship". In guy talk that means, "I don't see myself marrying you". so, it is time you move on. The fact that he's letting you go by "taking a break", is all the more clue that he isn't in love with you. If he was, he'd be crazy to to a break from you and risk you meeting some other wonderful man that could sweep you off your feet. Go with what your gut feeling says. If it says for you to move on, then by all means, move on. I wouldn't hold my breath about a "happy ending". I'd just date other guys. If he sees you dating other men, that might spark an interest in him wanting you back. Either way, you need to move on with your own love life, because you deserve the best.
A
female
reader, miso31 +, writes (24 August 2008):
So what is his meaning of a relationship? If you're spending time with someone monogomously for 8 months aren't you in a relationship? Sounds like he got freaked out by how serious things were getting. This is incredibly, ridiculously hard, but the only way to see if he has cold feet or is just not that interested is to give him space and time. That means making yourself ridiculously busy with friends, hobbies, family. Who's idea was it to not see other people? Personally, if you meet a man who wants to take you out I wouldn't turn it down! Not that you want to play games, but it wouldn't hurt if word got to him that you went out with another man. Accept that things may not turn out the way you want them to. Maybe this separation is delaying the eventual breakup. But do know that he is not your world and although you may miss him terribly, you deserve someone who couldn't bare the thought of losing you and is proud to be in a relationship with you!
...............................
|
