| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: This sounds a bit pathetic - but I just need a little advice.I am gay and met this boy a month ago and we have really hit it off.I am quite shy and nervous and on our first date I stupidly I told him I was from Manchester when in fact I am from North Wales. I don’t know why I told him this, I can only put it down to nerves and the fact that sometimes your mouth runs away with you when you are on your first date. I also live in a small town so I suppose I said Manchester so he knew where it was.He has since asked a few questions about Manchester which I have given short answers to. The thing is, I have really fallen for this guy and I know he feels the same for me. Should I just come clean and tell him how nervous I was or just play along with it.
View related questions:
shy Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2005): Dear, don't worry about this. Bev gives you excellent advice and I agree with her. Just tell him you were nervous and a bit edgy on that first date and you got "dumbfounded" momentarily. We all have been there. I would term this as a "fib" not even a bald-faced lie but I realize you don't want to make a bad first impression so just come out with it.
Although I don't condone telling harmful, vindictive lies because they always catch up to a person...telling an accidental "fib" is quite the human thing to do. The good thing about this-is you are aware of what you did and you are willing to rectify the blunder. That show you have some morals and ideals deeply embedded in there, somewhere. And really, when one thinks of it, the only beloved messengers of the truth are little children, because it's refreshing, comical, (and often embarrassing) to hear them speak so honestly and forthright. Little scamps! lol
Did you ever wonder what would happen if everyone decided to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth for just one day? Imagine no BS, no covering up, no lies of commission or omission, period- not even the smallest, most innocent little white lie. Sheesh-the world would be a boring place! (smiles) Relax and enjoy your new relationship. Have fun and take care
Hugs,
Irish
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (6 October 2005):
 This doesn't have to be a big issue, just come clean with it.
Say something like: "Remember when we first met and I told you I was from Manchester? Well, I was really nervous at the time and I don't even know why I said that. I'm actually from (fill in the town), in Wales. I'm so sorry about misleading you, and I didn't mean to lie about it. I wanted to clear this up before it got out of hand."
It's the honest true and you're levelling with him. No sincere person will hold it against you because you were nervous on a first meeting. Just reassure him that you will never lie about anything to him again.
Please do it soon, because you'll have to tell him soon, and you don't want him to think you're a compulsive liar about even little things. Just tell him that you wanted to make a good impression, and for some reason, Manchester leapt out of your mouth instead of your real town.
Go on!
...............................
A
female
reader, TRUITY +, writes (5 October 2005):
Good Heavens girl, grow up! lies get you no where in life, they always jump up and bite you on the bum sooner or later. Just tell him, and have a good laugh at your own stupidity..... and dont do it again. do unto others!
...............................
A
reader, pops +, writes (5 October 2005):
What tangles web do we conceive when first we deem to deceived... Stop! Its bad enough to listen to women obsess over lying to boyfriends, but to listen to guys doing this too, is too much. Tell him the truth. If he gets mad, apologize. If that is not good enough, try another guy. and learn from this mistake. It is the little things that can ruin relationships. Its not generally any big thing that does. Ask yourself why you lied in the first place. None of the rationalizations you give sound true.
...............................
|
