A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and i have been going out for two months now and all we've done is kiss.I really want to take it to the next level, but in every other relationship i've been in, it's the guy who's taken the intiative. How can i suggest to him that i want to do more?I'm really worried he might think im a slut because basically, he's perfect and just wants to spend time with me and doesn't care what we do, but i really want to do more.How can i suggest it to him without looking bad?
View related questions:
cheap Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2008): hey guys it's me again (i asked the question) you all seem a little worried that i'm 13 i can assure you i'm at the top end of the age limit soon to be exceeding it so don't worry that you're encouraging a 13 yr old into sex lol it's just the way the question thing worksthanks for your replies! it's some great advice!
A
male
reader, medic999  +, writes (30 March 2008):
Oh dear i've only just realised your age!!! ignore my message!!! (cries) i'm still new to this lol
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 March 2008): Hi, i believe that if you want to take the next step up, you have to ensure that he is ready, tell him that you want to enhance the relationship, if you believe that he will dought you or see you as a 'slut' then he might not be the right guy for you, but if you want him then tell him what you think rather than not enjoying yourself, i hope this helps you...
...............................
A
female
reader, Dawnie +, writes (30 March 2008):
 Well you are very young to start a sexual relationship, you have only been together 2 months which is not long at all. My 13 year old son has a g/f, i suppose they have been going out for a few months now. I have spoken to him about sex and he assures me that he is not thinking about having sex as he knows he is too young. What i am trying to say is some boys are ready for sex at a young age and some are not. Don't rush this as kissing is fine and you can feel just as close and intimate with your b/f without all the worries that can come with a full sexual relationship. Enjoy what you have.
...............................
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (30 March 2008):
 You initiate what you want to do and he will respond.
It is not correct to say guys always lead because ,
some guys are too nice and are afraid of being rejected.
Some are colour blind and cannot see your green light.
It does not matter who initiate it , because the job gets done and you are satisfied.
Do not expect the guys to initiate all the time.
...............................
A
male
reader, polarkite  +, writes (30 March 2008):
 You are pretty young. Maybe he's never done anything more serious than kissing!! I just hope you are closer to the 16 end in your age bucket.
Anyway, one trick that usually works, is that you could try giving each other massages. The basic trick here is to get really interested in massage, how sensual and healing it is, etc etc, you know get passionate about it. Ask him if he'd like a massage, then give him a really nice passionate massage. Then tell him that you have been feeling real sore, and ask for a massage. Eventually, after all the touching, one thing will lead to another.
But seriously, if he's not there yet he's not there, and if you try to force it, it will seem awkward and possibly slutty. Just take it slow with this guy, I'm betting he will appreciate it.
...............................
A
male
reader, medic999 +, writes (30 March 2008):
Let me tell you what I like...this is a bit of an erotic message just slightly but it illustrates the point.
You seem like a wonderful woman and a really genuine passionate person too...you're not a "s**t" and he will not think as such, you like him and you want to take it further that's normal and natural!
Ok, so I am sat on her bed....we begin to kiss and carress each other, i kiss her neck and and her collar bone....she then begins to suck on and bite my ear gently...and softly she whispers into my ear "i want you to make love to me!" :)
Works for some, not for all!
The question is subjective....how much further do you want to go? if you want passionate love making sit down and talk with him, tell him what is on your mind ,explain to him that you like him so dearly and that you feel comfortable with him enough to want to take it up a step, see how he feels, if he explains that he doesn't think he is ready or it's too soon then comprimise with him, wait for him, things like mutual masturbation (if he agrees to that, again suggest it to him) is a great way to semi-climb the step if you know what i mean, the key is being subtle but not so much that he misunderstands, try suggesting taking it up and listen to him, he should appreciate how you feel and if he feels the same then he may jump your bones haha if he feels the same but is hesitant then do what i suggested at the begininng, that WILL get him going, i promise you hehe and then go from there!! you never know, maybe he is counting on you approaching him first, he could be shy so give it a shot and let us know how it goes!
I wish you the best!!!! good luck ;)
...............................
|
