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I want to spice up our sex life, any ideas would be welcome.

Tagged as: Sex

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Question - (29 May 2008)

10 Answers - (Newest, 30 May 2008)

A female age 30-35, anonymous writes:

This is not so much a great dilemma, just some fishing for inspiration.

My boyfriend and I have been together two odd years, love one another dearly, and we have been having sex for about nine months now.

Recently, it's gone from long lovemaking sessions to a twenty or thirty minute routine sort of thing. I'm not dissatisfied, not in the least, but I'm looking to add a little variety into the bedroom - something other than the old missionary/on top/from behind stuff.

So I'm after suggestions - I'm open to quite a lot. What are some techniques that work for you folks? Foreplay, positions, equipment, handy websites?

Any ideas would be appreciated. =)

View related questions: foreplay, sex life

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A female reader, Gio +, writes (30 May 2008):

Have fun :)

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A female reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (30 May 2008):

most welcome :) hope it helps x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2008):

This is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thanks for the advice guys!

Aphex, that website is just the sort of thing I've been looking for - all I've been able to find is the standard issue positions, and the stuff about 'know your body, know your partner'. I know both, I just want to know what to /do/ with them, haha.

Gio, I think I recall reading the same exercise, but I had forgotten about it until now, so thanks for reminding me - I think I'm going to have to do a little shopping this weekend...

And the margurita sounds a good addition too - I always find I'm a wee bit self concious when it comes to wearing the sexy lingerie, so perhaps I just need a little something to loosen me up, heh.

Again, thanks a bunch! =)

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008):

My husband and I have been married for 12 years and have 3 children. Neddless to say sex had gotten boring. Last summer he talked me into trying things I had always been to shy to try. The first thing I needed was a marguritta to get me to relax, next was some very erotoc lingerie, and last was a camcorder and digital camera. We had a blast! I never felt comfortable watching porn so now we make our own. After you get over some embarassment you find yourself not being able to wait till the next time. The only thing is now we need new ideas for our for our videos and photos. If anyone has any ideas I'd love to hear them. Hope this helps.

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A female reader, Gio +, writes (29 May 2008):

Hi! Just another idea for you:

Enhance your intimacy and your sexual satisfaction.

Bring heightened sensitivity into your sexual life. See what you can bring into the bedroom that would stimulate sensual pleasure. How does a feather feel on the back of your/her knee? How does it feel to have a recording of the ocean playing while you/she runs the rough (or smooth) edge of a seashell along her/your inner thigh? Be creative Build this kind of pleasuring activity into each and every sexual encounter, the goal is pleasure and connection . I am copying here an exercise that I read recently, :

This exercise is designed to help you get in touch

with all the areas of your body and learn about how

and where you like to be touched, and how your

whole body can respond to loving touch. It is an exercise

in awakening your senses and experimenting

with different sensations.

The goal is to learn about how your body responds to touch. Each partner will take a turn at giving and receiving pleasure. Set aside at least an hour for this experience. The room should be comfortably warm and you need to arrange not to be disturbed. Turn off the phone.

Warm the lotion. You might also want to use candles,

music, aromatherapy, or whatever else would enhance

the sensuality of the experience.

Partner A is to simply lie back and enjoy the experience.

He/she disrobes and lies on his/her stomach

first. He/she may want to close their eyes in order to

focus more effectively on bodily sensations and feelings.

Partner B should begin by putting lotion on their

hands and beginning to caress and touch Partner A’s

body beginning just under the hair line at the back of

the neck and ending with the bottom of the feet. Then

Partner A is asked to turn over onto their back and

beginning with the face, Partner B pleasures the front

of their body, the breasts and genitals. (This

applies to both male and female)

You are asked not to talk during the experience except

to tell the pleasuring partner if the touch needs to be

modified to make it more pleasurable. If one area is

particularly pleasurable, you might want to ask the

pleasuring partner to spend a little more time in that

area.

The entire process should take at least twenty minutes

per person.

At the end of the pleasuring, both partners might want

to rest for a few minutes before trading places. Then

Partner B should simply lie back and enjoy being

pleasured while Partner A strokes and caresses him/

her using the same process as before.

Then choose a time when you can be uninterrupted later

and discuss the experience using these “lead-ins”:

“What I liked best about the experience was...”

“The type of touch I enjoyed most was...”

“I loved it when you...”

“Next time we do this, I’d love you to try...”

Focus on the positive, and what felt best for you,

physically and emotionally.

Enjoy it :)!

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A female reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (29 May 2008):

crap i posted it twice omg i look so dense sorry lol

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A female reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (29 May 2008):

oops forgot to add web site lol http://101-sex-positions.com/ x

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A female reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (29 May 2008):

oops forgot to add web site lol http://101-sex-positions.com/ x

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A female reader, aphexinfinite +, writes (29 May 2008):

why not go to ann summers and see if anything tickles your fancy. why not try ice cubes whipped cream chocolate fruit. outfits handcuffs..vibrators, handcuffs, blindfolds...lol goes on and on..how about checking the web for different positions ie the butterfly spooning 69 ..this gives you A good explanation on positions pictures too. hope that helps aphex x

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A reader, anonymous, writes (29 May 2008):

u could try going to a sex shop and getting a sex game...it great foreplay and u get to do things u wouldnt normally do and find out things u dont know about each other sexually. it is a way to spice up ur sex life...something ordinary can seem soo much more exciting.

hope this helps

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