A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi my boyfriend and I go to seperate colleges and he plays baseball. We have been together for 3 years and were planning on getting married the summer after graduation. Everytime I bring something up that I'm concerned about I.e. Money or something along that line he gets mad and says i'm thinking too far ahead. I'm just excited and I just want to be prepared so we don't have to wait any longer. I suggested maybe getting a job to save up instead of being supported by his parents while he plays baseball so we can be ready and if he really wants it, to support me and start our life. But he gets soo mad and says quitting baseball is not an option. I don't know what to think. I'm frustrated at getting yelled at because I'm concerned about the preperation of our future.
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male
reader, vampiric_nikolas  +, writes (7 October 2009):
i wouldn`t quit what i love either. but yeah i guess it sounds like he`s putting you on the back burner but to me it seems he is not ready to you know follow through with the idea of the "m" word. i think you should rearrange how you say stuff to what is happening now and what you would like to happen than what you want to happen and when will this happen. things feel like pressure when it seems there is a demand. hope this helps
A
female
reader, hijacked_dignity +, writes (6 October 2009):
 How long is it until the summer after graduation? I am thinking it's quite a bit of time, seeing your age and that you started college. You two have a lot to worried about without a wedding on your plate. He likes baseball, so don't pressure him to quit it. Now is his time to do what he wants and have fun with it. He already mentioned that he agrees to get married the summer after graduation, right? I would stop worrying about it so much. If it's going to happen, he'll make it happen. In the mean time, you two should just be having fun and enjoying life at college!
Continuously bothering him about it is only going to put him off to the idea. You just have to be slightly prepared that things might not work out the way they are supposed to. Maybe you two won't get married? Maybe you'll get married sooner than the set time or later? You can't tell the future, and you shouldn't be preparing for it quite yet. Just try to push it out of your mind and let him be. He'll make the decisions and set forward plans when he's ready for it. Continuously bringing it up and worrying about it will only put him off, so start concentrating on your own life and start having fun. :) Good luck!
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