A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hii people!!im in a relationship with a guy for a couple years and we are planning to get married...he is very sweet ,caring and loving when he is normal..!!!he is the best partner one could get when he is normal...!!but when he becomes angry he is the worst person ever...abuses me with very bad words which hurts me a lot.after he losing his temper he will feel sorry for whatever he told and again becomes normal.The worst thing is that the reason for his anger is unperdictable..gets angry often..i'll plead him to become normal but whenever he is angry it is like a real break up in our relationship...i love him so much ..but it really hurts when he gets angry and abuses me..could anyone tell me how to control my boy friend's anger ?how to tackle him when he is angry coz it gets even worse when i talk or plead him..?help me..dont tell me to break up with him coz i love him like my life.. Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks a ton everybody!i was really depressed and confused about this!u people made things clear.or else i would have pleaded him throughout my life.i'll better take him to the counsellor and find a solution.hoping for the best.thank u everybody!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2010): My advice is get out while you can. My husband is the exact same way and while we have our great moments I never know from one moment to the next what may set him off. We've gone through counseling, he's on meds. and sometimes that works and sometimes nothing does. If you for better or worse want to deal with this the rest of your life then stay, but if you ever want to have a 'normal' relationship that doesn't feel like a roller coaster then move on while you still have the chance. My husband has broken my spirit in every way possible and I'm working hard to get my financial house in order so I can take my kids and go. My only regret is I didn't do it MUCH SOONER!
...............................
A
female
reader, Myrrh  +, writes (25 May 2010):
 You cant control your boyfriends temper tantrums. Only he can do that. And it doesnt sound as if hes making a very good job of it.
When hes in a good mood, ask him to find out about anger management training. And book classes.
In the meantime, stop pleading with him and getting upset when hes having a tantrum. Trying to argue with him or plead will just stoke his fire. So just find a comfy spot, sit down and be still and silent. Let his voice be the only thing heard.
When he no longer has you to watch or listen to, his attention will turn to what hes doing. He will start to listen to himself instead of you.
And when he starts listening to himself, he will slowly realise what he sounds like. An unattractive, borish potty mouth. You could even record him and play it back to him when hes being normal.
Doing that might help a little but he really does need anger management training or maybe counselling. If not you will eventually get sick of his tantrums and find someone nicer x
...............................
|
