A
female
age
41-50,
*steven82
writes:hi i really need some brutal advice here!!!i met this guy in a pub, he works there, he gave me his number but he said that he is texting his ex but he would like to go for a drink with me at some point (and no he is not a player, a few of my friends know him and say he is lovely genuine guy) we have been texting and arranged to go to go out tonight, he told his ex as he wanted to be straight with her, obviously she spat the dummy out and demanded that he was not to go out with me! he told her it was only a drink and a chat. she then said ok as long as he does not sleep with me.he then text today and said that the ex has told him she has changed and acts nice when she wants to be nice! he said he thinks it only fair to give her a chance as she has promised not to be so insecure and controlling like she has been previously! i text back going oh well hope it works out for you if it does not give me a text (which i should not have done but i just wanted to see his response if any) he test back saying that we dont have to stop texting because of her and the next time in the pub i have to sneakily buy him drinks!!i want to keep in touch with him but i dunno if i should!Help!
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female
reader, raiders  +, writes (28 April 2010):
 Not worth the headache, You have not invested any time or emotions on this guy so stop while your ahead.
A
female
reader, Midge +, writes (28 April 2010):
 Eh? Are you kidding me? Seriously, do you think there is any hope for you if he is being strung along by a woman and at the same time, stringing you along? No chance in hell!!!
AND, to top it off, you should sneakily buy him drinks? Any bloke that tells you to sneak around is NOT worth the hassle. He either wants to be with you, or not......no grey area there!!! I would just stop texting now, and if you see him in the pub, be polite and say hello, but dont buy him ice in winter!!
Do you seriously want to be an afterthought for this guy? I know I would rather be alone than be an afterthough! He tells you in a round about way that if relationship with ex doesnt work out, then he's gonna come calling to you. Booty call more like!
Drop it now before you get in too deep!
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A
female
reader, ladyjaye +, writes (28 April 2010):
 this guy is messing you about... how dare he involve you in his and his exes mess, no you should not keep texting him you should save his number as "dont respond!!" or even better block his number altogether... if you must go to his workplace and you have to order drinks or something then keep it strictly civil... no chit chat cut it short and do not buy him a drink. im sure he will beg for you to talk to him and if he corners you then tell him that you've moved on and have nothing more to say to him and good luck to him and his partner... gud luck!
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (28 April 2010):
 Do not keep in touch. You don't need someone who tells you he'll go out with you but only if his first choice doesn't work out. He's obviously not over his "ex" yet and she will do anything she can do make sure you or any other girl don't go out with him. If she really was his "ex" then she should have no right to say who he can or cannot see.
You do NOT want to get in between those two. Stay clear.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 April 2010): First off he is a player!! He's telling u its his EX but it doesn't seem like it!! Sounds more like a girlfriend!!! Why would he tell u he texes his ex??? And why would he tell her he's going out with u and get an approval??? Makes no since!! He still cares about her and why start something with a guy who still is not over his EX?? So move on!! Drama drama drama will follow if u keep talking to him
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