A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi am 23 and getting married next year. I have a friend of mine who is in her 40's and I am very fond of her and of course due to this, invited her to my wedding. But the only problem is her partner. He's what you'd call a 'TitsPervert'. I was at another friends wedding the weekend and he asked me to dance and because I didnt want to be rude I agreed. But just as the fast dancy song ended, a slow song came on. I went to walk off dancefloor but he dragged me back. Now I laughed it off and thought to myself it will be ok for 1 dance. He started complimenting me on my eyes and personality and stuff but then he started breathing really heavily on my neck and rubbing against me. I got really freaked out as he made me feel really uncomfortable. So I walked away and sat down. He followed me but he let on nothing happened and when he got back to table acted as if it was nothing and put his arm around his partner, my friend. I dont know what to do.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 June 2007): I agree with Noreply101. Just because she is invited, it doesn't mean he has to be there. You are not obligated to tell anyone (including her) to bring an escort or date. You have already indicated to your gf that she is invited to your wedding. So if she thinks that your invite includes her bf, as well-tell her that's not the case. Be nice, polite about it. You could tell her it's a budgetary, money issue or you can just tell her what happened with him and hope like heck, she understands. It's a big chance but it may clue her into the fact..that he's not a good guy for her. If you aren't prepared to do all that and not risk hurting her feelings, there really isn't much you can do about this, then. She will want to come with him in tow. You have to remember, dear..when one plans a big special day such as their wedding--you will be very, very busy, very distracted at every turn. You probably will be so happy, so overwhelmed, this guy won't even be noticed. At every wedding there is always someone, undesirable, who has to be invited (a cranky old Uncle who drinks too much, a cousin and her hyper-active kids, a talkative, annoying Aunt)---always. I know it's your big day. But just get on with it and if he 'has' to be there--accept it and totally ignore him completely.
A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (28 June 2007):
 If he's getting too close, maybe you should speak to your friend about it. She's probably unaware to the fac that he's being like this with you and I think she should be warned.
Take her to one side and just tell her the truth, she should believe a friend over her boyfriend.
I think she needs to know what kind of guy she's with.
Take care x
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A
female
reader, noreply110  +, writes (28 June 2007):
I just got married, and I had a similar problem. Here is the "rule" about inviting people. Unless they live together or are engaged, you do not have to invite him.
But thats not your real problem. First of all, talk to your friend. Realize you might loose your friend for awhile because she is mad at you for bringing it to her attention, but take comfort in the knowledge you did her a favor. You are getting married in a year. You have a third option, if you can handle it. Say nothing. This guy being such a sleaze ball might take care of the problem on her own. She might realize on her own what is going on.
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A
female
reader, YummyMummy  +, writes (28 June 2007):
 This guy needs to know what he did was wrong. It's up to you whether you tell his partner or not, but you need to tell him to keep his hands to himself. I would suggest not taking him up on the offer to dance again.
I had a drunk guy at a friend's weeding a few years back try and drunk kiss me. I slapped him and walked off. He couldn't remember a thing the next day until people told him what he had done.
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