A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I'm unlucky in love and relationships basically and have no idea how to change this. I'm 26 and i have been in 3 relationships ... the 1st lasting almost 2 years, 2nd lasting 6 months and 3rd lasting 6 weeks. All the relationships have had problems via distance or difference of opinion regarding essentail stuff e.g. my first relationship was keen on marriage and i was keen on running the hell away from commitment. All the relationships have found me, i never went searching and it was nice in them but i always felt something lacking. Like maybe i've watched too many disney movies and i'm wanting an unrealistic prince so maybe i'm not recognising a decent guy when he comes along. Okay, so i can't change the past but how can i find a decent guy. There is the queation every lass asks i imagine at some point. I think i do need to work on my own issues such as confidence and trusting guys and actually learning to have friendship/relationships with them but how do i find said guys? where do i find decent guys to date? I'm used to dating coming to me but i think i need to go find it in a sense, or at least put myself out there so i'm more apporachable and avaliable to potential relationships. I think over recent years i've become a bit of a house hobbit, i need to get out more but its hard having a little baby in tow too. Any advice on where the decent guys are at?
View related questions:
confidence Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Jmtmj  +, writes (13 June 2010):
 There are decent guys everywhere... Only catch is that you can't necessarily count on them approaching you. Look at it this way... if you never choose to approach someone you think you might like then you'll inevitably end up having to choose from those who approach you... which isn't always the greatest, most compatible or genuine selection. If you're interested in being pro-active about this, I have a great exercise (which I've used) to help with building confidence and making new friends all in one, let me know and I'll explain it to ya.
Best of luck :)
A
male
reader, rcn  +, writes (13 June 2010):
 You do need to work on your issues. What is it that you don't trust? There are good guys, and there are not so good guys. Don't place the label of not being so good on all, you'll end up missing out on ones who are.
You also need to figure out what it is that you want in a relationship. (aside from the fairy tail) What are you looking for in a guy? What personalities fit well with yours. Look back at your relationship that lasted 2 years for that answer. Friendship is vital to having a lasting relationship.
I'd recommend frequenting establishments that you have hobbies in. Others with like interests will as well. You can get to know people there, and go from the friendships you establish in doing so.
...............................
|
