A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I need some advice. I am 21 and my now ex boyfriend is 24. He has graduated and I have another 6 months. My boyfriend of 6 months broke up with me over the weekend. It wasn't too much of a shock, as it was something I had considered myself. His reasoning was that he couldn't give me what I wanted - to see each other more often.We live around an hour and 15 minutes away from one another and got to see each other for a small amount of time every 2-3 weeks. Suffice to say, I was not satisfied with this and requested that we try and see each other more often, that we didn't live that far away from each other. At first he agreed with me and started to make plans. Then when he went home, he became uncommunicative - he was mulling the situation over and deducing whether he could give me what I wanted.He phoned me yesterday and said that the timing was not right, that he has been asked to do a lot of shifts at work, that he wants to try and find a job in his chosen career and on top of this he has to do a 17,000 word dissertation before May. I completely sympathise with this and agree, now isn't the time for us, as his priorities lie elsewhere and it also allows me the chance to concentrate on my own studies, without worrying about my relationship.But the truth is, I really like this guy and am hoping that we can reconcile further down the line, when he won't have so many commitments. How should I go about doing it?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2011): Hi hun,
I totally sympathise with you as im going through something very similar and im devastated at the moment. Me and my partner was together for 7 months and things were going great but his job meant he would work long hours and we bearly seen each other. This made me sad and lonely and i confronted him and said that i didn't see the point in us having a relationship if he couldnt make time for us. He went away from the situation and 3 days later said that its not fair that he's hurting me and still loves me but needs to let me go. I begged him to try and work it out but he just said that i deserve more. I would like to get back with him but for now ive just avoided contact. If this is meant to be then he will realise and get back in touch with me. Until then we have to stay strong and move on. I can't be friends with my ex as feel its too complicated at the moment. If you feel you can still be friends then try this and see what happens. Good luck
A
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2011): You just keep in casual contact and should your circumstances become more conducive towards building a relationship then you take another look at it then.
Perhaps next summer you can reignite this if your lives intertwine again but for the moment I would treat this as a complete break up. You've tried the LDR thing and seen that it doesn't really work, unless you both end up in the same city working I highly doubt you'll be together again. So consider it over and move on emotionally but keep in contact. If the LDR is the only reason you broke up then there's really nothing to say that you can't try again in the future.
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A
female
reader, angiebaby12 +, writes (20 December 2011):
 For now you should just concentrate on you, finish your studies then see where things take you, as hard as it is not to call the guy or wonder what hes upto take the time apart to realise what you want from life too, worst thing in life is sitting around waiting for a man to make his mind up, show him your strong inderpendent and your doing fine, when he sees you he will wonder why isnt she bothering, as hard as it is study, keep a strong mind, and try not to worry about boys at such a young age before your studies xx
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A
male
reader, RAINORFIRE  +, writes (20 December 2011):
 Well I know exactly where your coming from. I suggest backing off a bit just tell him you would like to be freinds. His studies and his work are his priorities rite now and nothing you do will change that. Try to reamain freinds and stay in his loop.I also suggest that you keep your options open.
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