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I want to dump him but don't want to hurt him

Tagged as: Breaking up, Dating, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (30 October 2016) 4 Answers - (Newest, 30 October 2016)
A female United Kingdom age 18-21, anonymous writes:

I go out with this boy and he loves me so much and I don't want to hurt him, but I don't love him as much. I want to dump him but I'm afraid that he will hate me and possibly regret ever going out with me. Any advice?

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (30 October 2016):

Few things suck more than having to dump a good person who did nothing wrong. Its a catch-22: if you stay w him, you're the bad guy for stringing him along AND you are being unfair to yourself; BUT if you dump someone who did nothing wrong, you're also "the bad guy".

There is no gentle way to say, " I'm nor attracted to you "

I would say maybe you can tell Dude, "I'm sorry, I'm just not feeling it"

My 15 year old son anthony just got dumped for the same reason. He's a harmless Minecraft/Dr who geek. I had to explain to him that anavrin had nothing against him.

I was in your place in 1991. Guy named Kevin. :-(

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A female reader, Honeypie United States +, writes (30 October 2016):

Honeypie agony auntWould it not be "kinder" if you broke up with him now instead of dragging it out?

If you don't FEEL that strongly about him, you should end it. But you can end it in a nice way or a rude mean way, up to you.

And at age 13-15 it's kind of normal that you aren't as sure of how you feel and who you want to be with. Maybe in all honesty, you aren't really ready to date seriously?

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A female reader, Youcannotbeserious United Kingdom +, writes (30 October 2016):

Youcannotbeserious agony auntIf you are old enough to date, then you are old enough to finish a relationship if it is not right for you. ("Dump" sounds so much more vicious than the experience has to be.) And you also have to accept that your boyfriend MAY hate you after you call off your relationship. Everything you do in life has consequences and you have to decide whether they are worth what you want/need to do.

Maybe explain to your boyfriend that, while you are very fond of him, you feel you are too young to settle down into a serious relationship. Don't give him false hope that you two may get together in the future if you don't feel that will happen as stringing someone along in that way is just cruel.

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A female reader, Andie's Thoughts United Kingdom +, writes (30 October 2016):

Andie's Thoughts agony auntI know this is nerve-wracking, but you're young - you'll both date people and forget about this in a year or so :) Just sit privately and be gentle - don't blame anyone or make it more complicated.

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