A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear cupid, I am a single mature woman my children are grown I want a relationship but I been through so much with men that did not deserve me til I don't know whether I'm going or coming .My son thinks I should leave life alone because he have seen me cry but its been 13 years.I am still young I feel it too but my heart can't take hurt anymore. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, olderthandirt  +, writes (27 September 2014):
 You are only as old as you feel(gee, I wish that was true!) Find a place where there are lots of like-minded folks and go hang out with them, I don't know where, church,dance lesson, yoga, night school.. use your imagination. You sound young at heart. Just be careful, there are more losers out there than there were 13 years ago. just watch yourself. ood Luck
A
male
reader, RickLC +, writes (26 September 2014):
I would recommend that instead of looking for a "relationship" just make it your goal to make new friends. With the right person a relationship will develop on it's own.
As the others have said take things very, very slowly.
Good luck!
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (26 September 2014):
 P.S.: In the 13 years since you last dated... we've had a couple of wars.... and the Rolling Stones have continued to tour.....
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (26 September 2014):
Dating is kind of like swimming in a spring-fed lake in the mountains. For the lake.... you KNOW the darn thing is going to be VERY COLD..... but, if you want to swim there, then you've got to jump in....
Same with the dating..... jump in.....
Good luck...
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (26 September 2014):
 I can understand your uncertainty. My sister went through a horrorific divorce and only now..14 years later has she decided she'd like to date again at 48. I will tell you what I told her. Go slowly. Don't do anything that doesn't feel right or comfortable for you. Put a toe in..test the waters out. As Honeypie suggested..join some groups, mingle, get to know people..see if anyone peeks your fancy.
No one wants to get sweetie...but sadly its part of the dating scene..you win some, you lose some. Not everyone is going to be right for you, but if date a little while, you might find someone you like, and they like you back.
Just use caution, and go slowly. If someone doesn't sound right/act right..they probably aren't. You'll never know if you dont try though, right? Try asking your friends/family..they might know someone. It can't hurt! If not, you can always try the internet (use extreme caution!)
I wish you all the best of luck!
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A
female
reader, moon river  +, writes (26 September 2014):
 Maybe your not in the right place to start dating at the moment if your feeling vulnerable or like you say, can't take the pain. You need to be happy with yourself first and foremost :)
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (26 September 2014):
 I think you are going to have a hard time dating if you can't "take" hurt.
Dating (specially at our age) really seems to be hit & miss, which means the FIRST guy you might date might not be a long term fella for you, neither the second. Know what I mean?
No one wants to get hurt. But if you don't live LIFE while you ARE alive - then WHEN are you supposed to live it?
Why not start out with more socializing? Join a hiking group or cooking class or something you enjoy, some adult classes where you can hang out with others. Who knows you might even meet someone nice.
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