A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: In the middle of April, I met this guy at my college through a mutual friend. He requested to add me on facebook, so we talked on there for a little while, and he gave me his number at the end of May, so we began texting pretty regularly. So far we’ve hung out twice, and we just made plans to hang out a third time. I felt really comfortable around him both times, and we talked and laughed a lot and had fun.I think it’s pretty clear that he’s interested in me, and I like him to an extent, but there are some things that I’m worried about. First of all, I just met him not even three months ago, so I don’t want to rush into something with someone I really don’t know that well. What if his nice guy persona is just an act? Everyone who knows him tells me what a nice person he is, and he hasn’t given me a reason not to trust him, but I’m still a little wary just because I’m not very familiar with him yet. Also, I’m going into my sophomore year of college, and he just graduated college, so I’m worried that once the fall semester starts we won’t see much of each other because I’ll be busy with school and he’ll be working, and this whole thing might just turn out to be a summer fling. And I’m transferring to a larger university a year from now, so I’ll be living about four hours away. Chances are a long distance relationship will be hard to manage, especially if we don’t have an opportunity to build a foundation before I leave. I’m just kind of stuck in the middle between wanting to date him and not wanting to date him. I don’t know what the right decision is. I see the potential for a relationship, but it would be a relationship that would require so much time and effort to work down the road, and it might not be worth it. But if we don’t take this a step further into a relationship, we may miss out on something that could be a really good thing. Both sides have their pros and cons, and I just don’t know what the best thing would be. I would definitely appreciate any suggestions or advice on what I should do. Thank you so much!
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female
reader, shrodingerscat +, writes (11 July 2012):
In my opinion, I feel like you're taking the whole dating thing way too seriously. Not every relationship absolutely HAS to be long-term, or leading to marriage, or even serious. Not every relationship HAS to have significance. It's 100% okay to date someone casually, for fun, without getting too wrapped up in labels or "future plans".
I think if you like him, date him, and have fun. If you have sex, use at least two methods of protection, and you'll be fine.
You don't have to fall in love and get married to every guy you meet, hon. Relax and enjoy yourself.
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