A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: i am 20 my fiancee is 23 we have been together for three and a half years and been engaged three year. recently I have become less and less attracted to him and although I love him, i'm just not in love with him anymore. We have talked about it and tried working things out, but he just ends up in tears begging me not to leave. I dont want to hurt him but I am becoming unhappy, and feel I am only delaying the inevitable. I dont want to loose him as a friend, as we have some really good memories and times together. Our sex life has pretty much disappeared, and I find myself getting annoyed by the smallest things he does. I would really appreciate some advice. thanks
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2008): I'm going through the very same thing. My boyfriend and I have been going out for 15 months and have been engaged for 4 months. I went to college away from home and he didn't. I met some really cool guys while I was there and have decided that at 19 I should not be engaged to anyone. There are still other fish in the sea that haven't bitten yet, and I want to test the waters before I dive in. I really don't want to hurt his feelings, but I just feel like he's not the right one for me anymore. I am planning to break up with him when he gets off work today. I'm just going to tell the truth. You know that old saying, the truth will set you free. I think in our situation it's literal!!!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 October 2007): I know what your going threw because im going threw the same... im am getting married to the man that i thought was "the one" and everything is gone he pulls the same thing he wont let me leace him its the puppy eyes with this one im 17 and hes 21 im not ready im just scared i guess but this isnt about me its about you im sorry belive me you will come up with something just try and try to tell him how you fill
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks Guys, I've just gotta find the right time now and go for it. Thanks for the support
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (12 February 2007):
You need to be strong and tell him that although you really like and respect him as a person you know he's not the one for you. 3 years is a long time and it's obviously become more of a habit, you being together more than anything else. Here are a couple of links that will help you to break it to him gently.
http://www.wikihow.com/Break-up-With-Someone-Using-Style-and-Sensitivity
http://www.wikihow.com/Break-Up
Good luck.
Eve
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 February 2007): Get it over and done with him as fast as you can so he can find someone that will be his true mate and will love him untill the end of time.
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A
male
reader, kenny +, writes (12 February 2007):
The longer you leave these things the harder they get. You have got to tell your fiance that you are not in love with him anymore. I know its hard but when he gives you the waterworks you have got to be strong and not give in to it, its for his own good.
Its better that you walk away now rather than later with a divorce under your belt.
Good luck x
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (12 February 2007):
What's great is that on paper, you sound certain that this is the right thing to do. You're not helping your fiance at all by letting yourself by influenced by his tears though. You need to be firm with him and don't let him emotionally manipulate you. You might think you're doing the right thing by giving in to him but you're just making it harder for him to deal with when he realises he can't change your mind. Sit him down and be 100% resolved to end it. You can't carry on living like this.
CD
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