A
female
age
30-35,
*pendy
writes:Why is this happening to me? Is it normal?So I loved my ex bf so much. and I always thought he felt the same cause of the way he'd talk about me to his friends and family.He was so sweet and lovely he told me he loved me and I felt like he did just by his actions and the way he was with me. It was like a fairytale. Everything was just so perfect with us.But he started been weird and dumped me and a few later I found out that he was sleeping with another girl behind my back for 2months wtf?Anyway, is been a year and half now and I'm over him. I don't miss him, I don't think about him. But after everything he did I can't bring myself to hate him. I still care about him. I Loved him so much he's the only guy I've ever felt that way about. lbut I know I can never be him or talk to him again.My friends all say I should get with another guy but I can't brig myself to do that.I use to be so fun and flirty before my ex but now I feel no numb. Im not interested in guys or dating.There's this cute guy that likes me and we've been getting to know each other for 3 months now and I feel nothing I take days to reply back to him and I'd rather do anything than talk to him or any other guy.What is wrong with me? Is this normal? I feel like crying I want the old exciting, flirty me back.. But I can't:(I'm 22x
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female
reader, BondGirl72  +, writes (8 July 2012):
 I think it is normal to do this after a serious break-up and it is ok. You really cared about this guy and you were hurt deeply by the betrayal and the break-up. There is no rule saying when you have to date again, if ever. It sounds like you have a positive attitude about it, but you just aren't ready to get back on the dating scene yet. I wouldn't worry about and just enjoy your life. I understand going from fun and flirty to numb. I've been through that too. The fun and flirty will come back to you one day...trust me on this!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2012): I can't give you a solution but I'm in the same situation. I found my partner of 3 years had cheated on me a year into our relationship. He says he loves me. But I don't believe it.
I feel if I leave I won't be the fun flirty easy going person I was prior to this.
I am not afraid to loose him, but I'm afraid that I'm just going to mope about what he did.
I have lost all trust in people and it's something I have to come to terms with.
I hope it gets better for you, remember you did nothing wrong he was the scum who cheated and betrayed you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2012): Hey, I've been there and honestly it comes with time. what I did and worked was I went to the salon got highlights a new haircut , got my nails done, used some make up and pampaered myself, and started to go out, not necessarily to clubs but I went to the mall, and guys looking at me started to raise my self esteem, then I stepped it up and started going to eat with friends, then later to clubs and started to talk to people, or in school or work I would try to be more open. If you keep yourself open I'm sure the opportunity for you to be flirty will come, you just have to gather yourself and love yourself now and you wills tart to see the old happy you come back!
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