A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I want some fucking revenge! After eight months after a terrible break-up from a two-year relationship, I was finally able to walk away from a Friends-With-Benefits thing with my ex. This happened about a week ago and I just feel so awesome about myself for having been able to finally walk away!The problem: He thinks he still has control over me. He thinks he can still manipulate me to do what he pleases. That went on for nearly three years and I was finally able to say, "STOP!"I don't want to get physical with this guy (fighting) because for one, I just don't want to see him ever again and for another, that's a bit immature. And I don't want to verbally abuse him because that's what he did to me for almost three years. I'm stooping down to his level; especially when he cheated on me as well. I do want revenge, though. I just don't know how to go about it.
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cheated on me, immature, my ex, revenge Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Jamz  +, writes (5 August 2009):
Hi there,
The best revenge you can get is by showing him you are nothing like him! Dont stoop down to his level! Make something of yourself, show him you dont need him and dont care about him any more and that nothing he says or does can affect you any longer. Once he sees that he no longer has a hold on you it will burn him! Its the best possible revenge as you are doing yourself a favour and moving on whilst getting him back ;-)
Good luck with it all!
Jamz x
A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2009): Agreed with Rifraf, revenge does nothing but to breed further vengeance. Further vengeance causes a loop of further vengeance, repeated.
Most wars around the world were initiated to satisfy one's pride and control over someone and something else.
For myself, I have 'learned' to side step my 'opponents'.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (4 August 2009): Sorry to hear what you have been going through and i am glad to hear you have walked away.
by the sounds of things the best revenge would be to completely ignore him! show him who is boss and that you dot need him and want nothing to do with him. dont responde to texts, calls, messages anything just ignore it all because as soon as ou respond it show to him that you still have a need to communicate.
if you dont responde to anything he will slowly go out of his mind over it because he will realise that you are stronger than he is and you are taking control.
if you go and seek any other revenge not only is it likely to be illegal and get you in trouble but it will also show to him that he has got to you again and he still has a hold over you.
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