A
female
age
30-35,
*eopardlover93
writes: I'm 21 years and I have been with my bf for 3 years now my boyfriend stayed at mine temporarily and during that time he got made redundant, he still owed her over 250 pound in rent so he had to pay it back, he got a new job in London but still had other debts to pay off he gave her some but not all. My mother is now angry because of it and refusing to let him come over at all I have to stay at his the weekend and he lives 25miles away so it is also expensive and I pay a lot of rent, also my mums partner don't like him and says if he comes round he will disappear ! I only want him to come now and again for short while what do I do! She won't reason with me at all !
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female
reader, CindyCares +, writes (21 April 2015):
I am afraid that "like I see it " is right.
You mention that you pay a lot of rent , which I took to mean that you pay rent to your mom ?, right ? So, if the question is : should not this enable you to do the heck you want with whomever you want under what it is ALSO your roof ? the answer is : not really. When I lived in Manhattan, NY, I paid an unordinate amount of rent, you wouldn't believe how much I paid. Still, the rule of the building was : no dogs allowed. Had I brought a dog home, I would have broken my lease and gotten kicked out. Living somewhere entails paying rent ( if requested ) AND respecting house rules.
I would not even put up a battle for that. Parents can be stubborn and irrational like any other person, so some times it's worth arguing with them, but, in this case, your mom should want under her roof a guy who stiffed her 250 pounds ?, are you kidding me .
A
female
reader, leopardlover93 +, writes (21 April 2015):
leopardlover93 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for the advice :) x I think I'll have a chat with my mum and it may be time to move out soon as I'm 22 this year
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A
female
reader, like I see it +, writes (21 April 2015):
I'm sorry to give you bad news, but this one falls squarely under "her house, her rules." Her obligation to house you stopped when you reached adulthood. In letting you live at home (an arrangement I assume saves you money, or you'd be living elsewhere) she is doing you a favor, even if it might not seem that way at times.
Her obligation to your boyfriend is nonexistent, especially since your boyfriend is already unable to hold up his end of the last deal he made with your mother.
Save up for a place of your own. The sooner you move out, the sooner this won't be an issue.
Good luck and best wishes!
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