A
female
age
36-40,
*mpressa
writes:Hi, im really depressed because i didnt expect that we gonna turned like this. we spent two years. i am 20 years old now and now my ex bf is 18 years old now. i met him when he was 16 years old and i was 18 that time. i am his FIRST TRUE LOVE,I AM almost his first in everything, we really loved each other,he experienced a very deep relationship with me...we've been in many down times together. he actualy dropped his school for me because he wanted to be with me, he was so jealous, proud that he has gf even im older than him, he fought out with his parents and he said he loves me because that time his parents didnt expect that their baby has a gf now, we went in many places, we shared many happy memories...and there were times we had so much fights but in the end we still love each other, i did many mistakes and hurt him too, but the love was there...and NOW we BROKE UP... recently, just last week, he told me that he wants space and he wants to be independent which i do understand because for a long time he was with me and he was dependent. and what hurts most is he has a new gf now and he told me that yeah he loves her but its not that like we had...that most of the people around us saw us how happy we were unlike his new relationship. his new gf is 14 years old and he is 18 now. but his parents still likes me because their parents did witness our love we had. and his parents are still want to talk to me and hoping to be with their son. now, he is studying again and has a better grades...i am sad coz he has new gf now...but he wants me to stay and he promised me if he will be back he wont loose me but do i still wait for him? i feel like a least option which i was not before. is he happy now? actualy we made promises that we gonna be together in time. but he told me that he is happy with his new girlfriend but i feel not like we were even his parents dont like the girl esp. his mother. im really sad...do i still have a hope with me? and the last time we were together we were happy...i feel that he loves me. please help me, and the what is that if talk so strong he makes dramas...that i dont love him anymore if im weak and crying he will says that i need to accpet the reality he has new gf now. but he keeps on saying i love you. i am the one who cut our communication coz i wat to move on but cant stop thinking of him. and he always saying that if someone will come to my life that guy will be lucky ect. PLEASE GUYS HELP ME OUT! i want him back...coz i really love him.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2009): I really feel for you, but chasing him is not going to change anything. Let him go - maintain no contact. You dont want to been seen to be desperate and make a fool of yourself. Keep busy. Men generally want what they cant have. Let him feel your loss. If he does not come back - he is not worth it and you deserve a lot better. No matter how hard it is go out with friends and do things - you have to learn that life goes on even if its without him. You are not alone there are lots of people that have been where you are but we learn to love again.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 August 2009): It is a difficult thing, I know. Two years is not a great difference, but at a certain age it can be a problem. I think you should be glad that he has decided to finish school. That is best for him. Naturally he is going to have a different social life now. Use your best judgement. It would be OK I think for you to remain friends with his family if you were before. But I would not try to push for a closer relationship if he is involved with someone else. Keep your options open and do not avoid a possible new relationship with someone else. It will be a while before your ex is on his own and you can't know what the future is. Best wishes.
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